You flatter me, sir. I would very much like to get published one day, but haven't figured out what I want to write yet -- gaming stuff or novels/stories. Comments like this are very encouraging, so thank you for taking the time to read my work. :) Go to Comment
This should be a cartography guild sub, not the dumb strolenatis! Its got the whole flavor of cartography- maps, Here There Be Dragon signs, and maps. Anyway, great 10. One question- for the Labyrinth, why couldn't somehow just fly over the maze? The simplest thing would be to put a ceiling on it, but you said that people could see the glint of the gold, which means there's a hole in the ceiling. You could have the dragon kill the "cheaters," but for me that doesn't match the dragon's- someone who spent the time to make a giant maze- character and personality. Go to Comment
I too like the way it reproduces.
But something that ravages an already ravaged wasteland really does not carry the same threat of destruction as something that comes out to disrupt the hubris of peace and prosperity. The real story would start when the hellebabies make land fall in Sweden or some other country that sat out the war. I like the idea, but this doesn't seem to be the whole story. Go to Comment
The babies never get to be much bigger than a normal elephant. I said as much, but it's kinda buried in there. Controlling them is still an art, however -- you've got to find some way to control that tail once it sprouts. I imagine that some communities just cut the tail off entirely, while others find a way to bind it. Very few have mastered the art of riding the a hellephant into actual combat, but its still pretty early in the timeline. Go to Comment
Nice work. Do the babies eventually grow into the huge version? And if they do, how do the communities that raised them deal with the full grown monstrosity? Do they kill it off before it grows too powerful? All in all, pretty good. Go to Comment
Took a few days to come back to this, 'cause you gave me a lot to think about Mystic. Right now, I must confess that I've never taken a writing class and so Aristotle's Incline was news to me. But while the Incline introduces the three act structure and the order of events, the Hollywood Formula differs in that it focuses on the required characters and their interactions throughout the storyline.
Now, looking to serialized television to show us how to treat a group of protagonists is really sound advice. That article you linked was great, and I would definitely recommend that others go check it out. I suppose that you could adopt that stance towards your party, while keeping the overall campaign focussed around the 3 Act/3 character structure. Each gaming session would then feel like a TV episode, but the campaign as a whole would feel like an epic movie. At least, that's what I got out of it. Thanks for the thought-provoking comment! Go to Comment