What bumps this up for me is the contradictions and problems that the NPC and his current situation presents. He is a revolutionary and rebel who has found himself a leader. We need more NP characters like this one. Many NPCs "make sense" and would be stable and self contained until PCs are thrown into the mix. This NPC is on an unstainable path. This NPC has a story cause you know he can't last. Also the phyiscal details are over the top and extreme. These are kind of physical details that help a spoken word medium like roleplaying.
I think there some broken links and formatting issues that make the post a little incomplete.