Strolen\s Citadel content. 
Anamis's Spectre-Shard
Items  (Jewelry)   (Magical)
valadaar's comment on 2013-11-05 10:26 PM
This is a really neat idea! Go to Comment
Mind Bite
Items  (Melee Weapons)   (Magical)
valadaar's comment on 2014-11-17 03:27 PM
A cool item with definite role-playing potential.

Go to Comment
Items  (Jewelry)   (Magical)
valadaar's comment on 2013-05-18 07:35 PM
There is potential here, it needs help to get out. Go to Comment
NPCs  (Major)   (Natural)
valadaar's comment on 2007-10-13 07:40 PM

This is a neat take on the Elf.
Hmm, Elf freetext? Go to Comment
Rurik's Tomb
Locations  (Other)   (Plains)
valadaar's comment on 2011-07-10 07:32 PM

First thing, look at the provided feedback.

Second, I'd completely redo everything past "The Wight vanished, and perhaps it still sleeps in one of the last of the undisturbed tombs."

Do not go into 'module' detail with such things as "If there is a ranger or someone with wilderness lore in the group, he or she will know that the spores of the fungus are highly dangerous" - that is somewhat game specific and is jarring in terminology compared to the lead in story.

Instead, since this is not a full length module, but an idea that others will flesh out to full detail, outline the major cool or interesting features of the tomb. Perhaps carry on the narrative somehow to describe the tomb in the same tone as the lead in text.

Third, clearly define which King is which. I assume King Arkon is the older king and Dora's father is the newer king. Say King Rurick is King Rurick a lot sooner then when metioning Rurick's tomb. I was orignally confused as to who was who.

Fourth, I can't help but think of Dora the Explorer when the princess name is Dora.


Go to Comment
NPCs  (Major)   (Criminal/Espionage)
valadaar's comment on 2016-02-03 11:19 AM
Lots to this one, with unanswered questions of course, but sometimes thats a good thing.

A decent backstory - I like it.
Go to Comment
Locations  (Any)   (Regional)
valadaar's comment on 2007-01-26 11:58 AM
A good start, but appears to be just that.

It is pretty unremarkable so far but could be a lot better. Go to Comment
The Sword Elanzer
Items  (Melee Weapons)   (Heroic)
valadaar's comment on 2016-04-18 11:40 AM
Only voted Go to Comment
Disappearing children
Plots  (Discovery)   (Single-Storyline)
valadaar's comment on 2014-06-10 09:15 AM
This smells like a Grimm fairy tale. Simple and effective.

Go to Comment
Little Dark
Locations  (Forest/ Jungle)   (Country/ State)
valadaar's comment on 2012-09-14 11:27 AM
Found this using unvoted, which is random, and this sub certainly fits the bill.

This is a neat take on the smurfs, which were an epidemic when I was growing up...

Go to Comment
Kassil Khirsah
NPCs  (Major)   (Combative)
valadaar's comment on 2014-03-13 12:30 PM
The classic career dragonslayer. A bit of a standard type - he needs a little more to make him be unique. Go to Comment
The Martyr's Blade
Items  (Melee Weapons)   (Combat)
valadaar's comment on 2013-05-31 05:48 PM
Not bad, though dealing the same damage to the wielder and the enemy means he can't beat low level foes he could otherwise dispatch easily without the sword. Go to Comment
Items  (Melee Weapons)   (Cursed)
valadaar's comment on 2007-08-23 11:03 AM
As others have said, it is a decent enough item with a negligible backstory. Better then a generic cursed sword, but could have been a lot better. Go to Comment
Locations  (Forest/ Jungle)   (Regional)
valadaar's comment on 2013-03-01 09:34 AM
Only voted Go to Comment
golden golem soul coin
Items  (Other)   (Magical)
valadaar's comment on 2007-02-13 04:09 PM
This does have potential.

Take a look at other subs and flesh it out more. Take peoples advise on spellchecking.
If you need a word processor, check out OpenOffice (Google it). It's free and it works well.

You're the author - the mage's name need not be lost to history. I've suggested before that one can have the Players History which can be vague, incomplete and wrong, and then the GM's history which provides the GM what he needs to know about the item. Go to Comment
Lost Artifact
Plots  (Hired)   (Side-Quest)
valadaar's comment on 2013-05-06 11:48 AM
Another sub where the discussion it elicits is better than the source.

An overly harsh intro, and he never submitted anything afterward. Go to Comment
Haran Hearthheart
NPCs  (Scenario Based)   (Religious)
valadaar's comment on 2013-04-18 03:44 PM
Okay, this is a hidden wonder. I agree with the commentary and love the writing.

Top notch! Go to Comment
Shreed Reckkit
NPCs  (Major)   (Combative)
valadaar's comment on 2014-11-10 01:32 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
The Spike of Fate
Items  (Wand/Staff/ Arcane)   (Campaign Defining)
valadaar's comment on 2014-11-10 01:55 PM
Interesting that the wizards that created it could not use it. Seems like rather poor planning on their part. Especially ironic considering the nature of the item.. :)
Go to Comment
It was just a book
Plots  (Crisis)   (Multi-Storyline)
valadaar's comment on 2014-06-19 02:21 PM
An interesting idea - the book as portal has wonderful symbolism to it. Recursive adventures :)

Go to Comment
Total Comments:

Join Now!!

Fatal error: Call to undefined function top_menu() in /home/strolen/public_html/lockmor/application/views/citadel/vfooter.php on line 2