Strolen\s Citadel content. 
Hammet's Guitar
Items  (Art and Music)   (Magical)
valadaar's comment on 2015-09-17 10:56 AM
This is an odd one - the selection of a name that is 1 character away from a real, famous guitarist is somewhat jarring, but okay. It seems oddly placed in time as well - comments about 'bards' and princesses while seeming to be an electric guitar .

Decently written, but I think the Metallica Guitarist dropped in the Middle Ages idea could have had a bit more work to make it fit a little better. An interesting idea to think on how they would manifest though.

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Looking for Love?
Items  (Potion)   (Magical)
valadaar's comment on 2009-08-15 07:22 AM
Missed this one when it came out - not bad! Go to Comment
Splinter
Items  (Melee Weapons)   (Magical)
valadaar's comment on 2007-01-04 11:28 AM
Needs a bit more work I think, though the evolution from a wooden practice weapon to a true weapon of war is an interesting concept. Go to Comment
Gnomish Riveter
Items  (Tools)   (Magical)
valadaar's comment on 2006-10-26 07:43 PM
Now, for why someone would need/make something like this, I have one word:

Chainmail.

A smaller version of this device would be a godsend, as the best chainmail armor had riveted links. I've make chainmail the lazy way, by squishing links together with pliers, and that was tedious enough. I can't imagine the amount of work required to make a riveted suit with medieval technology... Go to Comment
Stebanos Paint
Items  (Home/ Personal)   (Non-Magical)
valadaar's comment on 2008-03-17 09:10 AM
Simple, effective and realistic - many real-world cosmetics include toxic materials, just in low (hopefully) doses. Go to Comment
The Regulators
Society/ Organizations  (Criminal/Espionage)   (Regional)
valadaar's comment on 2014-04-21 01:03 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
The Order of Restraint
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Country/ State)
valadaar's comment on 2007-01-23 08:02 PM
Interesting, though I am reminded of the sharks in Finding Nemo.... Personally I think vampires should not be sugar-coated. They are anti-life and evil. But that's my opinion.

There are blatant spelling errors that should be addressed and some of the sentence structures need rewor - like
"In a world where rival vampires would like to get you out of the way to be on the safe side and where the inquisition hunts anything not 'natural' not to mention fledgling vampire slayers trying to start on less vicious vamps first they find there is safety in numbers. "

This should be three sentences - too much is being conveyed in one.

My advice - Take Moonhunter's Advice wholeheartedly. Go to Comment
Magic on the Wing
Items  (Other)   (Heroic)
valadaar's comment on 2014-07-18 11:39 AM
This has sat uncommented for far too long. This is great stuff - I love the idea of falconry.

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The Thrillkill Society
Society/ Organizations  (Criminal/Espionage)   (Local)
valadaar's comment on 2015-10-29 02:36 PM
Not bad - this would work best with 'gritty' rulesets where surprise is crushing, since surprise seems to be their biggest weapon. Go to Comment
The Duelists of Aoh Chiane
Society/ Organizations  (Combative)   (Country/ State)
valadaar's comment on 2007-10-30 04:02 PM
A random result which is quite nice - it has a very oriental feel to it.
Crouching dragon hidden dragon come to mind though without quite the magical feel. Go to Comment
The Crying Ones
Lifeforms  (Ethereal)   (Any)
valadaar's comment on 2015-03-13 10:06 AM
So evocative. Terrible that there are so many opportunities for these to arise.
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The Crying Ones
Lifeforms  (Ethereal)   (Any)
valadaar's comment on 2015-03-13 11:18 AM
Are you following me? :) Go to Comment
The Sailmaker's Needle
Items  (Tools)   (Magical)
valadaar's comment on 2015-06-11 11:34 AM
Another quality item here - and the 'attraction' to storms could be very subtle. It would be those captains who are a little more tolerant of bad weather that would be in greater danger, for - magic or no - a storm takes time to come close.

It may be subtle enough that the locals who use these sails simply build sturdier ships over time - shipwrights who built too frail ships would be eventually driven out.

I like it ! Go to Comment
Hammar's Code
Systems  (Political)   (Specific)
valadaar's comment on 2013-05-06 11:19 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
Atistaur
Lifeforms  (Third Kingdom)   (Any)
valadaar's comment on 2006-10-10 04:11 PM
I do like your take on Demons. Go to Comment
Hundtaur
Lifeforms  (Third Kingdom)   (Other)
valadaar's comment on 2013-04-26 11:08 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
Harrotaur
Lifeforms  (Third Kingdom)   (Other)
valadaar's comment on 2006-09-03 07:39 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
Cloak of Sweet Devotion
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
valadaar's comment on 2014-08-21 09:55 AM
This is a good item!

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How to be a better critic!
Articles  (Rules and Advice)   (Players)
valadaar's comment on 2007-02-05 11:16 AM
I think this one needs to come to the fore again. Go to Comment
Get a Plot
Articles  (Resource)   (Game Mastering)
valadaar's comment on 2015-02-13 01:23 PM
This is a great one - I think we could add lot more here!
Go to Comment
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