Strolen\s Citadel content. 
The Strolenati Mountain Sheep
Lifeforms  (Intelligent Species)   (Mountains)
olontur's comment on 2010-11-05 06:47 PM


3 (Solid post) + 1 (originality) + 0.5 (personal like)



 



This is a complete post: Proper back story, proper twist, can be integrated into any world.



I think even though this in a changed form could be used in game, it should be more viewed philosophically and comically. I f the writing style was just a bit better, it'd qualify for a 5 in my view...



 



Good job! :)


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The Strolenati Mountain Sheep
Lifeforms  (Intelligent Species)   (Mountains)
olontur's comment on 2010-11-05 06:48 PM


Oh, and any roleplaying and backstory oriented player might enjoy just hearing of these... :)


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The Ska'ag
Lifeforms  (Intelligent Species)   (City/ Ruin)
olontur's comment on 2010-10-25 03:18 PM


not overly original, but has a nice flavour.

:)


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Skillet
Locations  (TransWorld)   (Other)
olontur's comment on 2010-10-17 09:41 PM


Shrewdly cool! (or hot)


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Grandfather Pestilence
NPCs  (Mythic/ Historical)   (Mystical)
olontur's comment on 2010-10-17 06:47 PM


Enjoyed it a lot!



Intelligently written, with about detail as a well-educated (N)PC should have about a deity.


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The Tower of Light
Locations  (Fortification)   (Any)
olontur's comment on 2010-09-29 08:53 PM
Great idea, that needs so much more work!

Even if the enigmatic quality of the Tower requires it to be mysterious, it seems to me that it's used far to often by the community around it to be so "un-researched". Scholars, wizards and priests should flock around from everywhere, politics, ethical conflict, religious claims, all these would make such a powerful, if immobile device the center of attraction for many. and for instance, local rulers should guard it quite heavily if it goes of as good as every moonlit night...

but it's just my two cents then... :) Go to Comment
A Series of Tubes (Endless fall trap).
Dungeons  (Underground)   (Traps)
olontur's comment on 2010-09-24 06:48 PM
Awsomeness of a trap in essence! Go to Comment
Recursive Portal Trap
Dungeons  (Underground)   (Traps)
olontur's comment on 2010-09-24 06:56 PM
A levitate, fly or similar effect, magic or psionic, could get you out of the process of constant falling.

Plus, I'd see the dungeon "owner" needing to maintain the trap to keep it free of debris and mice and other stuff (read corpses). Alternatively, the magic of the portals could just teleport stuff somewhere else after some time of falling. Go to Comment
Staff of The Golden King
Items  (Wand/Staff/ Arcane)   (Heroic)
olontur's comment on 2010-09-09 05:29 PM
An interesting item with some possibilities. The story around it could be polished up and the powers would need to be a bit more concrete.

Yet I think it's a very good seed.

And wow, seeing from the Sun's point of view, WOW!

:) Go to Comment
Lantern of Flameless Light
Items  (Equipment Listing)   (Magical)
olontur's comment on 2010-09-02 02:02 AM
I love it for many reasons! It's got personality, it's useful, it's plausible.

Even though I would personally prefer a more "In-Character" description for it, the sub is well written and clear.

Two thumbs up for a very good Item!

:) Go to Comment
Alcha's Cup
Items  (Wand/Staff/ Arcane)   (Magical)
olontur's comment on 2010-08-27 07:27 PM
I like characters presented better than than the item itself.

The item represents the magic system, which is usable and believable but could use some more fleshing out. Go to Comment
The Zombie Strain
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
olontur's comment on 2010-10-31 03:36 AM


perfect!


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Horlord, Keeper of the Asdas
NPCs  (Minor)   (Criminal/Espionage)
olontur's comment on 2010-10-31 04:46 PM


Hmm, good stuff!



 



I'm just wondering, how come the Asdas hasn't fallen into wrong hands already? It isn't exactly inconspicuous, Horlord doesn't seem to have the best defenses out there, and rumours about it are all around. Is there a higher power (a la Ravenloftian Dark Powers) keeping it bound to it's keeper? Which makes me think this would fit perfectly into a Ravenloft-like system!



 



Awesome sub!


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Dogo-Kalamu
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Desert)
olontur's comment on 2010-11-08 09:41 PM


I just can't see why Anjet of Cenn Caerwaiththinks they should be eradicated, as they seem quite useful...



:)


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Faon Viandi
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Area)
olontur's comment on 2012-01-08 04:57 AM


Interesting, novell, plausible! All good things a rce should be. In fact, this is one of the better races I've encountered in the citadel. I like the last plot hook as well. And they are quite easy to integrate into settings lacking the Glade cabal.



Bottom line:



!good stuff!


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Aquurian Caravan Beetle
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Desert)
olontur's comment on 2012-06-26 03:27 AM
Biologist's note: If it feeds on roots, it wouldn't need snout but mandibles of some sort. :) Go to Comment
30 Legendary Antidotes/Cures
Items  (Other)   (Magical)
olontur's comment on 2010-08-19 05:13 AM
As a long-time lurker in the Citadel, i too found some works i had previously enjoyed a lot!
This is my first vote here and it's a solid 5/5. Go to Comment
Megamothoid
Lifeforms  (Constructed)   (Tundra/ Arctic)
olontur's comment on 2011-12-06 06:24 AM


like it a lot!


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20 Fantasy Prosthetics
Items  (Other)   (Magical)
olontur's comment on 2012-08-18 04:41 AM
24.) Bezoar's hooves

Taken from a huge mountain goat of the northern mountains, this pair of legs have to be sewn to the stubs of the user's lower legs. After the grafting is complete, there is a high risk of infection with mountain fevers, which will typically wear off after a fortnight at most.
The hooves allow the user to navigate rough mountainous terrain with goat-like ease and agility. Even steep inclines can be scaled swiftly and jumps across chasms of 10 feet are no feat for the wearer.

While in town users often would choose to conceal the hooves from superstitious eyes by wearing long flowing robes or pants, but the overwhelmingly strong, goat-y odor cannot be covered by even the most expensive perfume. Go to Comment
The Black Jester
NPCs  (Mythic/ Historical)   (Political)
olontur's comment on 2010-11-04 06:38 PM


Wonderfully dark and detailed! Only a few spelling and grammar errors, especially in the beginning of the story distract.



I wonder how you could provide a nemesis or antithesis for him, for example a nanny, in a similar situation, but reacting with compassion, forgiveness and love instead of despair and inviting demons...



 



:)


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Total Comments:
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