Strolen\s Citadel content. 
The Glacier's Fist
Items  (Melee Weapons)   (Combat)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-04-05 07:32 PM
That is really well done, Go to Comment
Host of Battle
Society/ Organizations  (Travelers)   (World Wide)
axlerowes's comment on 2012-01-23 04:28 PM


I read this, I thought it was interesting and I enjoyed the details.



 



 I would have enjoyed to see some more specific notes on their culture and how they relate to each other personally.  You learn a lot from society by who they consider to be a crimminal and celebratity and it is hard to get a feeling for a culture when everything is so even keel.   If you spend you write a story about life at sea no reader will except that it was all smooth sailing. 


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Terrain Features
Locations  (Other)   (Any)
axlerowes's comment on 2011-05-26 04:52 PM


Damn useful sub and perfect use of the medium.


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ISSF-23 Wasp
Items  (SpaceShips)   (Combat)
axlerowes's comment on 2009-04-09 06:03 PM
"Because someone had a bunch of wannabe hotshot pilots and needed a cheap fighter."


I am already a little geeked about this one, and the above suggestion makes me think this could be a fun read. Go to Comment
Aerophin
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Other)
axlerowes's comment on 2009-04-10 01:47 AM
I am not voting here, just an edit

"They are several evolutions beyond dolphins"

You can't say "evolutions" it implies a unit, and I don't think it is a word. Try saying derived. The use of the word "beyond" works if you have a defined starting point, an intermediate and a end point. Go to Comment
Aerophin
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Other)
axlerowes's comment on 2009-04-10 07:04 PM
I knew what he meant, and that is exactly why I think he can't use the term "evolutions". My understanding is that evolution is on going process, and that during this process organisims derive novel traits that will eventually seperate them for their genetic ancestor or even their contemparies. You can't say a tree is several growths taller than another tree. Go to Comment
Aerophin
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Other)
axlerowes's comment on 2009-04-13 12:29 PM
I suppose you could say evolutions if you are talking about several discrete paths. For example "Anaylsis of the gene pool of spotted moths, nonmigratory pigeons, and the common mouse species Mus musculus indicate that both moths and pigeons have been under intense selective pressure since at least 1700. The Mouse population however has maintained a degree of diversity predicted by our null hypothesis. The evolutions of the moth and pigeon population....."

Here you can use plural because you are discussing two evolutions, the evolution of the moth and the evolution of the pigeon. Above he is wants to state that his space dolphin shares a common ancestor with the earth dolphin. He a discussing a macro evolution relationship, the use of the terms "evolutions" and "beyond" should not be applied.
If the creature evolved from a dolphin population or reached a dolphin like state via convergent evolution then you are simply discussing the evolution of that population. They did not go through multiple evolutions. Beyond is unfortunate because it suggest a linear relationship, when really it is a branching relationship between related species. Beyond isn't wrong, I just think it should be used carefully.

Writers of speculative fiction deeply effect the general publics understanding of science. When discussing a topic such evolution is it not important that one deals carefully with academic question and considerations? Go to Comment
30 Bullets
Items  (Ranged Weapons)   (Combat)
axlerowes's comment on 2012-02-27 07:13 PM


Wow! This is a really well put together list with enough but not too much detail. Did depleted uranium not make it on the list? Did I miss it. Is it lumped with some other group?


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Artemius Coil, Physician
NPCs  (Minor)   (Knowledge/Lore)
axlerowes's comment on 2012-09-28 10:24 PM
I think this is really great, so well visualized and a very useful and complete side character. Nicely done thank you Go to Comment
Don't Forget the Coffin
Items  (Other)   (Non-Magical)
axlerowes's comment on 2012-02-18 03:45 PM


of the tables I have seen this one isn't bad, most of the items are reasonable and suggest at larger story behind them which what we are all about right?



 


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Don't Forget the Coffin
Items  (Other)   (Non-Magical)
axlerowes's comment on 2012-02-18 06:28 PM
Nyoria
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Country/ State)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-12 05:33 AM


Well now we are getting into the meat of this world. "The World of Neyathis has been populated by four major ‘invasions’ of humans from other worlds, including our (or an alternate) Earth, and so many of the peoples are strong analogs to known cultural groups" Did I some how miss this in the world of Neyathis write up. This discussion of why you wrote the world this way should be more prevalent if you are going write these meta-subs. But this is a neat idea and it us fun as a fellow dork to see why and how you wrote this.



However, this strikes me as no more developed than your Aldruku sub.



"their kingdom was shattered after a terrible defeat by their enemy" is this opposed to a a terrible defeat by their friends...



"As a dead people, they are little more then backstory, the creators of ruins and odd artifacts."



Are they a story worth telling or not?

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Headsmans Tree
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Forest/ Jungle)
axlerowes's comment on 2012-09-28 09:57 PM
This is really nice piece of gaming flair, can really add style to a setting. Go to Comment
Megamoth
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Tundra/ Arctic)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-12 07:30 PM
The primary weapon of the Freeman of Sargaris?

You jump between GM or out of game perspective, and in game perspective. Go to Comment
101 Villages
Locations  (City)   (Any)
axlerowes's comment on 2012-10-20 02:25 PM
this is a fun one, a very useful tool for any gamer. Go to Comment
The Black Man
Plots  (Coincidence)   (Side-Quest)
axlerowes's comment on 2009-11-12 07:18 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
The Maul
Locations  (Neighborhoods)   (Other)
axlerowes's comment on 2012-09-28 10:15 PM
I enjoyed this, and admire (if that is worth anything to ya) the composition. We get a little history, a little geography, a little ethnography and few overviews of notable characters. I also like how the links were employed.
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30 Firefighters
NPCs  (Extras)   (Combative)
axlerowes's comment on 2009-03-17 02:54 PM
I saw this on random and thought this would be really useful if in a whitewolf or shadowrun game you needed to grab a fire department cause your PCs decided they needed to get involved with one right away. It has the nice mix of subplots and blunt simplicity that make it accessable to most. While not a major creative effort it is well put together and handy.

So I am glad you posted it and I enjoyed reading it. Go to Comment
The Strange Ship
Plots  (Coincidence)   (Side-Quest)
axlerowes's comment on 2012-02-23 04:16 PM


The third option is Dracula.



I like the second option, the ghosts could actually provide much of the information that the cabin boy provides in option 1 but as Scras says it has that touch of saddness that makes it special. 


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Nymphs in Distress
Plots  (Hired)   (Campaign)
axlerowes's comment on 2009-10-13 09:17 PM
This strikes me as awfully railroady for a plot and anti-climatic. The death horse are a prime example of putting your characters on rails.

The plot is anti-climatic in that the player characters don't achieve the goal as much as they deliever a message to somebody who achieves the goal. I think many players would find this resolution unsatisfying. This would be particularly true if the PCs had a rough encounter with the prospectors early on, and are hoping to get a bit of payback or at least to be the instruments of justice. The fairy tale tone is different and interesting, and it is a very complete write up. I think the conflicts within this plot line need to be developed so that the players are more directly resolved in the resolution of the conflicts. Go to Comment
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