Strolen\s Citadel content. 
Anthony and Adora
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-04-02 06:21 PM
Somebody had a bad day...

Solid story, I think the choices you made worked really well for the story. Go to Comment
Anthony and Adora
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-04-03 05:14 AM
missed voting Go to Comment
Solitude and The Long Road Evelyn's path pt 1
NPCs  (Major)   (Combative)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-04-01 07:36 PM
SO IS SHE PREGNANT WITH A PUPPY? HOW CAN YOU LEAVE US HANGING?

WHAT HAPPENS IF SHE IS PREGNANT AND SHE SHAPE SHIFTS?

HOW DOES THE MASS DISPLACEMENT WORK?

WHAT PART WAS SHE PLAYING IN ROMEO AND JULIET?



But seriously, fun story, I plan on reading the rest as soon as they arrive.

I have some notes, you do good job of keeping the gender an open question during a first few paragraphs. Perhaps a better reveal would be "Then the audience saw Juliet lip locked with her mother?" (or nurse, or Romeo's mom-there are only like four speaking parts for girls in that play and the nurse is usually a dude).

I betting she doesn't finish that undergraduate degree in paleontology.

Great character base. Go to Comment
My Taalkastin Boatman
NPCs  (Minor)   (Natural)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-31 10:46 PM


*Reduction: The event described here as reduction is approximate translation from the Kaanarite language. If translated directly the elven term means either to shrink or to reduce, but contextually it refers to censure or punishment of certain families buy other families. The exact details of these punishments was not clear to the author at the time of this writing.

Go to Comment
The Arm of Saint Max
Items  (Home/ Personal)   (Magical)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-31 09:48 PM
Haven't finished yet but Carth's voice is excellent.... Go to Comment
The Arm of Saint Max
Items  (Home/ Personal)   (Magical)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-31 10:06 PM
This a solid foot note, as composition it strays a bit, but we get some much rich history and details about the world. Go to Comment
Orbs of Wendlehook
Dungeons  (Any)   (Doors)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-04-06 09:45 PM
Nice one, simple. Go to Comment
Augscannen
Items  (Computers)   (Non-Magical)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-04-03 02:45 PM
easier to carry around than a german shepherd I suppose (that is a terminator reference for you wee children out there).

One of the challenges for writing sci-fi stuff is the need to full realize all the minutia of the an advanced and rapidly evolving world. I think sci-fi world building requires a lot of posts like this one. Go to Comment
3 coins
Items  (Other)   (Magical)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-27 08:22 PM


I have heard versions of this the story before and I have always wondered why does fate hate the free market? Is fate some bleeding heart liberal? :)



If a bad man happens to give the starving guy his lunch, because maybe he didn't like his lunch, maybe helping the poor made him feel good about himself, maybe he wanted to shame the other guys around him, does he still get coin? Could he use the power of the coins to amass huge fortune and what does that tell us about fate? Or will the coins only work in the "vague" method of helping nice people?



If all this is up to GM is this really a developed item or plot?



But do you intend this be a tool to push your PC towards a certain morality or level of compassion?

Go to Comment
3 coins
Items  (Other)   (Magical)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-28 07:52 AM


"what count are facts, not the apparent reason behind it. Maybe he helped the man to shame the other? Ok that's fine but what count is that he still helped while other people were doing nothing, and who knows "



This is interesting and perhaps these coins could be or are being used to realize a certain perspective of fate (monkey's paw)



How far ahead does this lucky hand look? Might you loose a card game but as a result leave the tavern before it burnt down? Would it have burnt down if you were still in there? What if the Orcs whose tracks you missed go slaughter a village that includes a baby that would have grown up to be the Necro-tyrant that covers the world in a second darkness. Does having a the hand of fate guide you to the best outcome take choice out of the equation?



"Well Rex should we take the tunnel on the left or right? What does the Hag's map say?'



Rex finger the three coins in his pocket and says, "It doesn't matter, what ever choice I make is the right one."



Overall I am always weary of things that let you see the hand of the GM in the game. I know a lot of players look for it, but isn't more fun when we are immersed in the game? According to the intent laid out in your teaser, these things were conceived with the idea that the players will feel the presence of the GM.

Go to Comment
3 coins
Items  (Other)   (Magical)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-28 07:53 AM


Re-voted up, cause I'm all for stuff that gets me this geeked about "fate and free will" and I love eclipse for playing with me.

Go to Comment
3 coins
Items  (Other)   (Magical)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-29 09:01 PM
That was dismissive. Go to Comment
3 coins
Items  (Other)   (Magical)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-30 07:18 AM


Because you took the description to a meta-level, suggested that my questions were devoid of common sense and that my questions failed to comprehend the basic nature GMing.



But my questions were attempting to take the item away from the confines of GMing to an item. Because if you can only discuss the item in the terms of GMing then it becomes like your plus one sword. (nothing wrong with plus one swords) It becomes like your plus one sword because you can not move the plus sword to different medium without changing the way the sword is described. If you were to put that plus one sword in a novel or poem you could not describe it as giving the character "plus one to hit". This item description-specifically the way you expanded on it in the dismissive post- lacks verisimilitude and world building, because it is only describing a meta-level GM-player dynamic. Example:



"player on the other side will wonder if the GM, since he's a player so he know that everything in the campaign is regulated by him, gave him a real magical item or is just leading him to think that it is while they are just 3 normal coins"



Your stated goal in this piece was to write up an item that forced the characters to think about fate and morality. I had questions about your view and thus the item's perspective on fate and morality. You answer was that fate and morality are ultimately in the hands of the GM (true perhaps) and thus such questions are moot. Thus descriptions of the nature of your item are moot.

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Star Whale
Lifeforms  (Third Kingdom)   (Space)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-04-03 02:28 PM


I liked the lecture, perhaps the Golgafrinchan's didn't make up that whole space goat idea. You give us the concept of the space whale. It is an interesting idea for explaining mass extinctions because it forces a view human existence that includes the humanity as citizens of the galaxy. But because the space whale is so difficult for humanity or any person to interact with the idea it is difficult to engage with. Thus like the lecturer we are left with nothing to do but throw up the hands of imaginations.



What can you say about giant untouchable (almost unknowable) space whales ( that treat our planet like a cookie jar) that sucks.



Perhaps Moby Dick and the space whale are the last elements of nature that man can not conquer and thus must turn to religion in order to understand his role in the universe? But Moby Dick and Ahab had history, a relationship. There can be no personal relationships with a star whale.



You could go out and look for Moby Dick. You could look for and physically wrestle with the embodiment of natural death living among man's violent oppression and exploitation of the natural world.

Go to Comment
Golden Golem
Lifeforms  (Constructed)   (Any)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-24 12:44 PM
Nice item/creature, clear cut visuals and just the hint of a story...just a hint. Go to Comment
Golden Golem
Lifeforms  (Constructed)   (Any)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-24 01:11 PM


The partial story stands out a bit cause you lead with it in the teaser and open with it in the body of the piece. So going into the piece it appears like that is going to be the focus, but then it gets left behind.



I like the coin face idea. Also you should tack monster-of-the-week on to this

Go to Comment
30 Goblin Gifts
Items  (Other)   (Combat)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-26 03:24 PM


I do not believe that Cheka is incapable of adding people himself. If you enter 2130 into the contributor bar you can add Muro's name

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Bjonak
Lifeforms  (Third Kingdom)   (Any)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-04-03 08:27 PM
The image of the faceless avenger and expeditor of the Id is a classic trope. I can just see Leslie Nielsen screaming at the little girl "Your mind refuses to face the conclusion." (for the kids: that is a reference to the Forbidden Planet the most influential space travel movie until 2001)

But really the visuals are very neat.

What if a group of ruthless individuals get the mask and know what it is? Could they hire actors to go live with the masks for a few days carrying diaries that saying "Man I really wish Goldman-Sacs would drop four points by monday"? Or something like that Go to Comment
Demon Summoning for Idiots
Systems  (Mystical)   (Specific)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-12 06:48 PM
This is great! Well written, flippant, I love the voice...

"Thus, you must try to be as casual and aloof as possible, and make it seem like this demon is just some other demon: you summon and command far more powerful beasts than this pitiful wretch"

I bet Jacob Latris has a cool hand with the ladies. Go to Comment
Valadaars First Submission Advice
Articles  (Rules and Advice)   (Citadel Help)
axlerowes's comment on 2014-03-11 02:47 PM
"not that harmful, they cause a sub to drag on, and can seem condescending"

Welcome to the dark side buddy! Go to Comment
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