Corran could have just gone outside and used the woods, and I bet he would have too had his wife not been ashamed or embaressed that her husband was squatting in the reeds like a dog. I guess the moral of this story is that you can't please you wife all of the time and to attempt it is to raise the monkey's paw.
Poop jokes. toilet humor, a lament for the married man and unconvential magic items. You cover a lot here sir. Well done.