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Solitude and The Long Road Evelyn's Path pt 2
NPCs  (Major)   (Combative)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-05 11:14 PM
Thanks for the feedback, I'll give this an edit this weekend I get some time and take your advice into account, I really appreciate the time and effort it took to give me this much commentary. Go to Comment
Anthony and Adora
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-02 11:30 PM
Well put together story, with some interesting characterization and some interesting developments.

A small warning in the preface that the story includes a reference to sexual violence may also be prudent, given it could cause unpleasant flash backs to real life events in some readers . Go to Comment
Anthony and Adora
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-03 04:53 AM
Forgot to vote. Go to Comment
Solitude and The Long Road Evelyn's path pt 1
NPCs  (Major)   (Combative)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-01 05:26 PM
I've got plenty mote of these, but will spread them out over time, likely a new one every 2-3 days until caught up to the present, then likely 1 per week until it runs its course. :) Go to Comment
Solitude and The Long Road Evelyn's path pt 1
NPCs  (Major)   (Combative)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-01 11:06 PM


Lol aye, the gender vagueness was a deliberate choice, since the beginning was more to hook the reader, and challenge any preconceptions not long after. (which will prove to be an underlying theme as things develop.)



There's a lot of character building in the first few parts, with the action bits coming later, It's 60kish words so far, (and not finished yet) so lots of stuff still coming.


Edit:


Oh and to answer your tongue in cheek questions becuse it's 2am and I'm bored: :P


Doggy Pregnancy?


You'll have to wait an see, although as far as controversial/disturbing subs, that one would perhaps out do my sub about the reverse abortion of an undead fetus. Okay maybe not that disturbing...


Pregnancy shape shifting?


You'll just have to read on and see if she's pregnant :P


Mass displacement:


Unstable sub spatial molecular transference. When she shifts to a smaller form a portion of the extra mass is transferred into energy and released as a flash of light, the rest is bled into sub space.


When shifting from smaller to larger forms additional mass is drawn from sub space in the form of energy and then converted to create the needed material for the new form. (at least that's what the Delta specialists told her anyway ;) )


What part in Romeo and Juilet?


Juliet's nurse, Angelica. Go to Comment
Solitude and The Long Road Evelyn's path pt 1
NPCs  (Major)   (Combative)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-14 07:18 AM


Update: Edited to include the paragraph describing the characters human appearance.



(And for those who don't want to reread the first chapter just to find that one paragraph here's a quick reprint.



I remember pausing, finding my dark African American skin oddly foreign looking after seeing myself clothed in feathers, my black hair a tangle mess. years later people would say I looked a lot like Kandyse Mcclure in my human form, but at the time I was just geeky, and developed enough in the right places to get embarrassing stares from the boys in my class.

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My Taalkastin Boatman
NPCs  (Minor)   (Natural)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-01 05:41 PM
Very nice the narrative tone sets the scene nicely, and the over all presentation felt fresh and well laid out, definitely one of my new favorites! Go to Comment
3 coins
Items  (Other)   (Magical)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-04 02:25 AM


Interesting item, and I can certainly see it encouraging the rest of the group to also be more generous int eh hopes of receiving coins themselves (even if the luck is purely imaginary and only seems lucky to the PC's/players)



Oh and one small nit pick in the line: a woman who can't find his children and so on. (I just found the sentence a bit jarring due to the error)

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Gravediggers' Legacy
Items  (Equipment Listing)   (Combat)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-03-08 04:37 PM
With a little adjustment these cursed tools would work well in a Supernatural campaign, especially with the creator being part of a follow up adventure.

A solid 4/5 with an extra .5 for having immediate use to me in my gaming endeavors! Go to Comment
My Last Crop of Humans
NPCs  (Mythic/ Historical)   (Domestic/ Craft)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-03-04 04:19 AM
I really liked this one, it had a nice archival feel to the tale although the ending did feel somewhat abrupt.

Still it was a fun read, and running into this computer centuries later (with or without a struggling/prospering colony under it's wing) could make for an interesting adventure in an ongoing Traveller or other space faring sci-fi campaign. Go to Comment
My Last Crop of Humans
NPCs  (Mythic/ Historical)   (Domestic/ Craft)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-03-04 08:14 AM
Now you've got my curiosity Echo, what is your deduction for the computers "everything was clear to me now?"

My conclusion was the computer understood humans need the illusion of control over their own destiny to create, (I.E the pregnant woman) or destroy (I.E the weapons) as they see fit in order to feel "free" and thus "happy/content" with their existence. Go to Comment
Lescelina the Witch Queen
NPCs  (Scenario Based)   (Religious)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-02-28 05:57 PM
I really enjoyed this piece, with the plot hooks at the end providing a ready introduction into most fantasy campaigns.

It's a shame however that player characters encountering her will likely never come to realize her rich and fascinating background, at least not with any degree of accuracy.

A solid 5/5, the kind of NPC a GM can really get a handle on and have fun portraying!
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30 Judges
NPCs  (Scenario Based)   (Political)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-02-26 07:09 PM
Handy list for street level supers or police games, also great for random contacts for characters that could come in handy. Go to Comment
Felicia 'Fever' Cortez
NPCs  (Minor)   (Combative)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-22 01:40 AM
I really love what you did with a random roll, it's well fleshed out and interesting, the kind of NPC I could easily include in a couple of my games,

I've already got a random roll I need to flesh out in the next few days, this is a wonderful example of how to do it.! Go to Comment
Refuge Beneath the Waves
Locations  (Regional)   (Water)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-03-01 08:34 PM
It took me a while to read through hence the late commentary, but this definitely reminds me of the Bioshock series, (with a hint of Blue Planet) which only adds to the feeling of familiarity yet with it's own unique changes.

This is one of those settings that gab me and make me want to run a campaign and explore the concepts more thoroughly.

With it being set underwater it also makes this easy enough to plug into most other steampunk settings as a "hidden world" no one on the surface was even aware existed.

With a little work it can be adapted to sci-fi or post apocalypse settings easily enough as well.

5/5 and a HoH, really loved reading this one! Go to Comment
All Quiet on the West Third Street Front
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-03-28 07:23 PM
I like it, neatly written and with a touch of menace that at first seemed like something more, then faded to childish innocence.

Well worth a 5/5 :D Go to Comment
Not So Secret Identity
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-04-04 03:29 AM
Nice insight to how the Delta Factor world deals with "heroes" and some nice character building for Sarah. (It'd be nice to see her and her friends detailed as NPC's here someday.)
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Skeletrons
Lifeforms  (Constructed)   (Any)
Silveressa's comment on 2014-05-12 03:14 AM
They remind me of skelebots as well, accept better fleshed out and with more practical uses and depth.

With a little alteration they can be easily added into nearly any high-tech/sci-fi setting for variety, and to replace the traditional flesh and blood mook. Go to Comment
That Which is Forgotten
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - In General)
Silveressa's comment on 2010-12-22 05:05 PM


Short and catchy, with all the quality I'd expect in a short story from one of the published magazines like the Magazine of Fantasy & Science Fiction. 



The piece can work well as the basis behind a rescue mission for nearly any sci-fi setting, or a cautionary tale told around the star port bar by a retired brotherhood guard about what happens to those who are *too* successful with cutting edge creation. 


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That Which is Forgotten
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - In General)
Silveressa's comment on 2010-12-22 05:06 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
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