As other have said, an excellent spin on a familair trope, and easily useable in most fantasy settings with little effort. 5/5

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A solid support NPC to fill the necessary role  in  with enough human touches to make her believable and rather likeable. 

I do agree with others though the gal seems to be lacking a bit in any ultimate dreams or goals. Perhaps she desires to see her cybernetic marvel of a hand enter more wide spread use among  amputees? (Veteran soldiers especially)

Also, perhaps putting a space between each plot hook in #1-4 would help break up the wall of text and make that area a lot easier to read. 

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A unique and certainly memorable addition to the PC's collection of friends and allies; one they'd likely want to keep visting simply becuse of how much fun/intruiging he is.

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Excellent list, and can be easily modified to become Viper pilots for the BSG rpg. (or any other combat vehicle focused campaign)

Thanks for this, I'll be putting it to great use in my next scifi campaign :)

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An interesting silly race, definitely reminds me of Monty Python. Go to Comment

Neat and perfectly plausible among any monk orders. Of course if one of these finds their way onto a players char. they will likely consider it an insidious curse of the gods deigned to frustrate them to no avail. (Doubly so if they have a significant other or are frequent visitors to the brothels.)

It also can find good use for temporary wearing during minor surgery for those with a low pain tolerance.

Nice item! Go to Comment

Excellent setting location with a nicely detailed history that really brings it to life. Tis place can fit perfectly into any fantasy game with a little tweaking, and is the perfect location for those scholar and historians to investigate. (Either as pc's or by hiring the pc's for protection)

I would definitely like to see Deneb written up as a separate sub since she woudl make a great ally for the serpent to conjure up to help any adventure restore the kingdom to it's former glory. (Or as a reward for a job well done to keep the heroine/hero company on the nights there after.)

Solid 5/5

(on a small note I think the "Atlantic Awaits" woudl read better if it was "Atlantis Awaits" ) Go to Comment

An interesting weapon, but of limited usefulness if it can only be wielded by frost giants. Within a campaign the weapon could always be wielded by a frost giant villain, making him even more dangerous then normal. As long as such a ruler lorded over the icy mountain ranges it would give all but the most capable adventurers pause for thought. Go to Comment

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I agree with what Scras said, this sub could use more to it or perhaps less. Maybe cut out the throne, making it it's own separate sub, and focus on the glacier with a more complete history of what it is, how it came to be, etc..

Lovely start though, I look forward to seeing it more fleshed out. Go to Comment

That's the pivotal point of most campaigns, either attempting to reactivate the ships main drive or find a way off the otherwise doomed Ark. (Possibly something they can only achieve with the help of their hated rivals in another dome, or enemy tech priests.

You're right though, I should update it and add a few extra bits on escape. Go to Comment

Updated: Added in notes on possible ways to save the otherwise doomed vessel, as well as ideas for continuation of the campaign after the ship itself is rescued. Go to Comment

Aye, this one still sits in my "needs a revision" bin, awaiting one of those slowly rainy evenings when I've nothing better to do.

Glad you liked it, if you ever get a chance to use it as a one shot or whatever get back to me and let me know, I'd love to hear how it turned out. Go to Comment

Useful stuff for any gm, and good things to keep in mind when playing "inventor" style characters. (Applies to pretty much any genre as well, which is always a plus.)

The only thing I can think of to make it even better is to provide an example or two written up using all this advice. Go to Comment

Nice simple piece to include in your campaign to add some depth and back story. Muro's enhancements make it more unique and interesting. (Nicely done Muro!) Go to Comment

/bump to keep Kenji from fading into the unknown. (50 views and no votes or comments?) Go to Comment

Nice idea, but like others said it could use a little polishing for consistency. (Mainly where it;s already been mentioned)

Also your lines: After a period of five days the eggs hatch and the offspring squirm out. Upon hatching, the first thing the beetles do is to latch themselves onto the stomach walls using the suction pads on their legs.

After 5 days the would have most likely traveled entirely through the digestive track and been expelled with the rest of the bodily waste. Perhaps having the hatching time be a couple of hours rather than days would be better. (it takes approx 2-6 hours to digest a meal depending on what and how much was eaten)

Otherwise it fits nicely into any squalor and slum area, although I am curious how it denotes the difference between under cooked /raw meat and an open bloody wound on a person/creature. The other question I have is if they can swell to rat sized, what happens when a person has 5 or more of these things inside them? Does it rupture the stomach lining in the last stages of growth? Prevent consumption of any food do to filling the stomach?

Also any treatment/cure to alleviate the symptoms would be nice to see. (With it directly in the stomach I would imagine digestion of a large quantity of hard alcohol would serve to paralyze or possibly kill it) Does vomiting effect the creature? Is it possible to throw one up if you heave with sufficient force? (Especially if paralyzed by alcohol

Oh and the name seems a little incongruous with the description, since it spends the majority of it's life as a larvae in the hosts stomach)

Sorry to nit pick, but this has the potential be a neat sub with a bit more cleaning up. Go to Comment

Excellent rewrite Maggot, although there are a few punctuation issues and some wording bits that could use a small bit of cleaning out.

This new beetle as presented feels much more complete and well defined; and also much more insidious.

Another creepy parasite for the poorer sections of cities. (It also could work well in a modern/future post apocalypse game with a little modification)

Great job on the rewrite, and an updated vote! Go to Comment

heavily increased arousal and desire would be a good side effect, increasing the difficulty of keeping the newly reacquired "virginity" and heightening the chance of getting caught. Go to Comment

Interesting flower,although I woudl enjoy seeing more of the back story of just how they discovered it's second, and more potent application. Go to Comment