I like this character, and the fact that is both detailed, and has some personal history as well as a goal.
I would also have to agree with the Cap'n. There are a few pesky spelling errors, and the giant paragraph could use a few breaks.
I do have one question, if he is bipedal, wouldn't a large counterbalancing tail be both cumbersome, and often in the way? I only bring up the point since the tail is an extension of the spine, and a bipedal creature has a vertical spine, forcing a large, and likely rigid tail (If it is used as a counterweight to the upper torso when moving on all fours) directly down.
I agree that he would be clumsy, especially with fine movement and such. Large items, such as weapons, or other things of that nature wouldn't be much of a problem. On the other hand, writing and handling items made of delicate glass, or paper are right out. Go to Comment
He is very angry, and bitter over the matter. If he were more of a thinking man, as opposed to a 'crude crusher' he could be psychotic or worse.
The inability to write doesn't mean much to someone who never writes, but loosing the ability to feel something smooth, or supple like skin would be unbearable. To this end, he spends almost every cent he earns on liquor, or on prostitutes. Go to Comment
Had the idea after watching the new Sinbad flick and seeing the island fish tow the ship. The movie isnt bad, just not as well exploited or well done as it could have been. Some of it looked like CGI before texture mapping. I would give it a 3/5, but would only recommend it to gamers, or fantasy enthusiasts. Go to Comment
Interesting plot, it spins the generic murder mystery with two pieces of outside danger, the other actual murderer, and the deteriorating status of the castle.
It could be made even more interesting if the murderer already knows about the deterioration of the castle, and was willing to damage the remaining supports to thwart the PC's, regardless of what happened to the inhabitants of the castle. For a bigger twist, it might be someone like a young noble, or respected member of community.
On the other hand, I would think that there would be warning signs of the castle's poor condition. The floor of the greathall, or another large room might be bowling in towards the center of the room as the weight of the floor increases without support. Other areas might be subsiding, or cracking as the structure settles.
Like the expression goes, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. The CivyWhizzards want to eliminate evil and dangerous magics, but like EchoMirage said, most people don't know how to mind their own business. Go to Comment
Not a bad character, there is ample discription, and it is fairly well written also. I would have to agree with the captain, however, in that Hatsuro doesn't really stand out. I think he might be more interesting if the Crocodile Dundee was brought more to the surface than the Bruce Lee.
One comment on Alpha. A normal great dane is a huge animal if you get the chance to be around on. Most I have been around are nearly four foot tall at the shoulder, and one was nearly four and a half. They are already large dogs, much larger than wolves. They also already tip the scales near the 200 lb mark. A wolf hybrid that is twice the size of a dane, and only 200 lbs is going to look like the canine version of a scarecrow.
I would suggest dropping Alpha to a manageable size, unless he is specifically supposed to be the size of a horse, or up hiw weight to the 500-600 lb range. If you do bump his weight up I would suggest changing his wolf breeding to dire wolf stock, which did grow to stunningly large size.
Lastly, quick fact. Dogs lap up water with their tongues while a wolf will put his muzzle in the water and 'slurp' This is a test done with real life wolf hybrids to see if they can be legally kept. A hybrid can be as much as 15/16th's wolf blood, and as long as it drinks like a dog, it can be owned as a pet. If not, it has to be euthanized or handed over the licensed wolfbreeders who work with the animal agencies. Sorry for such a long responce, but I was on a roll
It is easy to forget that centuries ago that the law was as often enforced by fear and word of mouth rather than the presence of a civic police force. There might be a sheriff, or constable, but they were certainly not the modern equivalent of the LAPD. Feudalism often relied on making dramatic and powerful examples of those who broke the law to encourage everyone else to obey said laws. The idea is not much different than the brutal excercises of power that the Russian, and Slavic feudal lords inflicted on the peasantry up to the end of the 19th century.
If such punishment is commonplace enough to be accepted by the peasantry of a kingdom, it is likely that said kingdom will be rife with power hungry corruption at the top of the feudal structure, as well as many small coteries of conspirators and informants. It would also likely be ripe for a rebellion against the oppressive and unscupluous leadership.
At the top of this system, the genre 'evil lord' would reign supreme. Good setting, and interesting application, the freezing water is absolutely heartless.
This is an interesting, if potentially difficult plot to handle. The idea of a running war between vampires and demons is certainly out there, but it has potential, especially if you can give it some sort of sympathetic angle.
BTW, I play Vampire/Werewolf, and I think with the exception of Kate Beckinsdale, the movie sucked and bordered between insipid and stupid. Liquid UV?
Perhaps there could be members of the afflicted who are looking to redeem themselves, their human soul/essence/heart trying to overcome the tainted essence of undeath or the demonic blood in their veins. Or, perhaps a high ranking vampire, blood lineage of Bankskin has decided to rebel as the barbarians, having defeated their demonic foes, have lost their barbarian heritage and won't play the hound to the vampire master.
Yes, I was inspired by Anne Rice, should anyone be interested you can read more about Aunt Queen in the book 'Blackwood Farm'
I took the basic character and adapted her to fit a game setting, and if you had read the character completely you would see that Tarquinn was included, but in a tertiary manner.
AS for Goblin and Lestat, no I don't think that they would make good characters, too involved for the former, and too munchkin for the latter. Reading is good for GM/DM/ST's but far too many limit themselves to game books and the fantasy genre in general which produces a certain flavor of character that becomes old after a while, with everyone broken down into levels/XP/class and rank and special abilities. Go to Comment