The first comment that comes to mind is what would happen if the cloak was put on a dead body? Would that be enough to instigate the magic, or would it just be a magic cloak on a cadaver? Short and sweet too. Go to Comment
While the wording (bracer vs. bracelet) can be a little nit-picky, I think this is a good item since it definately has an artistic value to it, rather than meandering over into rune etched, glowing sigils sort of thing. I would imagine that the Frost Thorn would be quite the eye-turner even when it wasnt a frozen weapon. Go to Comment
Great character, motivation, backstory, the whole works. I like how she didnt start out looking for vengeance, or to increase her magical power, but simlpy went looking for the fairies on the glacier. I think she could also function as an anachronism since the glacial pace of her life has made her witness to many things that others wouldnt have noticed. I also like her name (Celsia, celsius) Go to Comment
Voted most likely to become a liche by his graduating class, before he soul-devoured each of them. sometimes a sympathetic villian with understandable, human motives cannot compare with something that has become so divorced from human morality that it really no longer constitutes a human being. Go to Comment
Alright, the twinning factor is certainly interesting but there has to be some sort of limiting factor to prevent the ubiquitous assault by millions upon millions of temporally manipulated berzerker warriors.
The whole area should be handlted judiciously and misuse should invoke the legendary Wrath of the DM! Go to Comment
Reminds me of Death Note, in the concept of writing a persons name causing them to die. It does need some sort of backstory to go with it, a sort of where it came from an why it exists sort of thing.
How precise does the name have to be, is the full name required, or birth name, or can it work with just a first name and specific intent? Could a wizard or noble avoid this spell by having a secret true name and the public name they go by? Go to Comment
The idea is solid, and the story of Rhian is not bad, though his name is repeated too many times. I like the basic premise of the idea, though the powers are too game specific. They won't work very well in a setting that doesnt use weapon speed or other factors. Go to Comment
Neat item for punishing criminals, assassins and rogue mages. Their sentence could be a preset amount of time wearing the ring, though I can see the local law 'forgetting' to take the ring off of the fingers of convicts when their time is up. Go to Comment
On the other hand I do like posts like this for what they can be dissected for.
1. The trees were enchanted to produce white light day and night by Lord Valanair - Who was this Lord, is he still around, why did he magic the trees to glow? We already have a potential NPC, and an odd lifeform - the glowing trees.
2. The Flute of Vaxtar - what is it, what can it do, etc etc etc
3. Ellivanor, Meltifiace and Quelfinare - Three cities, three locations. Why is Ellivanor the largest? Are there any rivalries? What are the cities known for, if anything.
4. There is an army of seasoned elvish warriors supported by 240 rangers - Seasoned armies have seen combat and survived if not prevailed. Who have they fought, who are their enemies, what were their losses?
Unofortunelty I must give this submission a 1.5/5, other than spawning some interesting questions, it is still generic, vague, and alltogether too short. Go to Comment
Could use some cleaning up on the formatting side, but aside from that a staggeringly cool read. The names are pure Penguin, leading us off to ponder their meanings, my favorite being the Prince of the Endless Corridor. There is a very strong and resonate dichotomy between the Understar's calm demeanor, and the power of will that bound the nine monsters to the pearls and would unleash ruin upon the world. Go to Comment