DL is entirely correct that magic swords are a dime a dozen, yet this one stands out quite effectively. The backstory sets it in high regards, with other luminary blades that were as often plot devices as they were weapons of magic power, such as Excaliber and Durandahl. The story is excellent and reflects the journey of the hero who in coming to terms with power must make the ultimate sacrfice at the apex of his power. Kudos for creating a truely 5/5 post Echo. Go to Comment
Feel free to link Maggot. I have found that posting characters from my own games generally generates a mediocre, or very little responce, so most of the NPCs I post are pretty much free to use, so long as they are not out right 'stolen'
Echo, so long as they are unique and worthy individuals, there is no reason to shy away from creating a batch of Half-demons. I was inspired by sTYKe's Kairos demon, or by what it could have been, especially the part about moonlight.
A note on Rachat's race, if I list him as Half-Devil, it conjures the idea of some sort of bizarre horned and fork-tongued monstrosity. Rachat appears, and acts human, and other than a few oddities, such as a taste for undercooked meat and his eyes, passes for human very easily. Go to Comment
Wonderful description and personal action, and I would agree with Adel that he is too powerful as presented, but with a little detailing, he could be truely great. Perhaps his appearance of power belies the less tangible flaws, perhaps ailments of the soul, or the spirit.
You are improving, I knew thatthis NPC was going to come up with a 'he got everything he wanted' ending, which would have been lame. I think it is good that he fell to the corruption of power, and I can see him being quite narcissitic and shallow, considering his rapid rise in ability.
rantYeah, because Pinocchio had the dismembered parts of a once living little boy buring in his wooden chest. I dont see any strong Disney, or Pinocchio elements other than the fact that both Cornelia and Pinocchio were both made of wood./rant
Cornelia should ideally seen with pity, as she is not much more than a ghost permanently bound into a wooden body. She has no face, and cant enjoy many things that a living person can, that is, she cant eat or smell, she cant have sex, she really cant sleep or dream either. All she can do is continue her existance in the perpetual service of a wizard that she has the benefit of loving. I can easily imagine other jacks being created without this sympathetic bond. Go to Comment
I can see the surface of the island covered in the marble and polished granite mausoleums of the wealthy, each a monument to the ego of the deceased. These would have been purchased with sizeable donations to the clergy, likely also 'selling' an offspring to the protectors of the island. Obviously these would be family affairs, with only blood relations buried in the many niches and alcoves within each structure. Nicely done.
Interesting work, I must say that I like it. I would like to know more about Big Red on an interaction level, what sort of personality does a giant mollusk have? Does he have the ability to alter his skin texture and pigmentation like smaller cuttlefish?
As a side note,I would note the fact that the kraken, or giant squid has the largest eyes IRL, and would translate that into an ability to percieve illusions as falsehood, and the be all but impossible to fool with invisibility.
I think the sixth paragraph would answer several of these questions, as it shows that the Druid served as an arbitrator to the locals, as well as keeping his valley safe. As for details such as his favorite animal, or his preference for sunrise or sunset, I try to pass along a feel for a character rather than setting out something set in stone. If I list Sitri's favorite animal is a blue-scaled Masuchi Dragon-lizard, what good does that do someone if they dont know what that critter is. His favorite animal can be whatever you want it to be, or need it to be. Go to Comment