Fascinating idea, with all kinds of twists and turns! I'm going to look into adapting it to my campaign sometime. Perhaps as a Fae encounter?
A good set of useful guidelines. I already do some when I have a horror episode in my regular campaign, and they work a treat.
Thanks for the others.
I agree with all the others on this. Very useful, for seasoned subbers as well as newbies (we frequently do not practice what we preach, after all!) I, for one, will try to abide by it.
A very interesting sub. I suppose that fermenting them would make some *real* firewater, Valadaar!
Wow! You know, guys, if you had been half as harsh on my first sub, I'd never have been back.
I agree that it was abysmally bad, but a lot of the comments were taunting or mockeries, rather than any kind of effort to encourage or mentor him. We all have to start somewhere, and I don't know of any writer who, when talking about his first efforts, doesn't say something to the effect of 'reading it now made me squirm with embarrassment'. At least he is putting something of himself on the line, which most people wouldn't dream of doing; he deserves something more than a put-down for that.
I firmly agree with Wulfhere and dark_dragon and the later posters. Agony - keep at it. Your later subs were significantly better, keep writing and improving.
Good idea, MysticMoon. I think I may use it, and your plot hook, in my campaign, as well.
A good sub. If you don't like the 'hell-traipsing' quality, it can be easily converted to other locales, modifying the denizens and suchlike. Nice descriptions.
Interesting. It doesn't fit into my campaign, but an interesting sub. I agree with Axlerowes, the story does't really grab me. 3/5
I agree with everything you said, but I wonder if we were a little hard on him. It is usually a good thing, particularly with new posters, that, in addition to critiquing them, we also find something good to say. That's been my experience as a Creative Writing teacher. Something like:
Welcome. It's good to get fresh ideas. You showed good enthusiasm, but your subject was kind of cliched. After all, mad gnomish inventors with their flying machines are very common. You would probably do better if you hit 'Edit' under your sub and tried to come up with something new and different, such as ........
What do you think? I agree that it wasn't very good, but if he never comes back, he'll never get any better. Don't we have a duty to encourage as well as critique? Or is my teacher mode getting the best of me?
I echo Dragon Lord. I'm not sure how to insert it into the game, but it sure would be interesting. A definite 4/5
Very interesting, but what is the point? Also, I got very confused with all the measurements. Are they supposed to mean something, or are they just there for any, all, or no reason? I do like the fact that they are *everywhere*.
Systems (Societal/ Cultural) (Specific)