This is simple, straightforward, and elegantly done. It makes me wonder what other sorts of wonders exist in such a world.
If I ever had cause to send the players out on a scavenger hunt, I would include a shard of the sun and/or the moon and then make them work to discover this place. And, perhaps, by having them go to both places they might learn something by what each says about the other. (Not that they'd want them to stop their rivalry! That would be apocalyptic :P )Go to Comment
A lot of nice touches with this one:
Using the runes as a way of marking time shows the importance of the runes to the Dwarven mindset. Breaking the assumption that folk living underground would have the same way of measuring time that we do. Using the length of days as a way to illustrate the Dwarven culture.
Creative and thought-provoking.
While this does fit somewhat into the usual ideal of a Dwarf, it doesn't feel stereotypical to me. The stories told to keep good little Dwarves in line is a nice touch, especially since it has real life analogues. The tankard-axe is pure awesomeness. And even though this is more "real" Dwarf than some of your most recent subs, it still sticks its metaphorical tongue at Dwarven society; despite the stories and the failures of others, Stout has managed to cross the line and live the life he wants.
Even before the end, I had a feeling this was a character you had played. The offhand references to past events had that nostalgic scent to me. Sounds like fun times.Go to Comment
I like that it's focused and pretty straightforward. A section rebutting alternative interpretations could have added a little depth to it, but it is fine as-is. Showing Dwarves through the lens of a scholar gives it a nice, readable tone.
I find myself wanting to know more about the author of the poem. Was it common for one of the lower caste to be able to read and write? Or to be able to write poetry? Was this an individual not representative of the Dwarva caste? Was this someone who felt trapped by their role in Dwarven society but wished for more? These are questions that the sub raises but can't answer because Matteus Carter doesn't know them. I like it when a sub gets me pondering like this.
How has this not been voted on yet?
I guessed at the origins, which, since it wasn't outright stated until the end, made me enjoy this a little more. Despite adapting from an outside source, this still feels like full-fledged Cosmic Era to me. Good work.Go to Comment