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Certainly a very high quality piece. Overall, I don't think I can really suggest any useful suggestions for improvement. Oh, one minor thing, the sub mentioned in the 4th paragraph something abt his "access to the nets" was limited. I thought this referred to the Internet or some such equivalent in which case it would be better to capitalise the "nets" bit else there may be a slim chance (very slim) that the reader might wonder abt it meaning something else (as I briefly did but then again maybe it's just me)
This might be a personal thing with me but I found the descriptions of each of the ghostly types at the City and some of the game mechanics info. distracting. I understand they are necessary as GM notes but they disturb me from a good legend abt a lost city that I thought I was reading. I think these could be addressed by some re-formatting. For example, you could put these two warnings in a blockquote and maybe move the ghostly type descriptions somewhere else (for example insert an asterick and then submit the ghostly types as a user-submitted idea below the main sub in that white space under Write Your Idea). I understand you might not be familiar with any of the formatting things I just talked abt, a useful reference on this topic is Strolen's CSS Demonstration Sub which can be accessed from the I'm Helping tab under the Library drop-down if the link here doesn't work. Also, I would prefer it if you put that bold note on adding maps in the future either at the very bottom or the very top b/c it disrupts the flow a bit b/w the two paragraphs on what the PCs could do inside the Dreaming Tower.