The sub has two great elements - the description of the chase, and the idea that the Mordanfey's abilities are limited when it's being watched.
As for the unicorn, methinks it was always kinda neat, but this is an interesting twist. Go to Comment
The Seacrab's big brother, the Neptune is a compact mech with articulated arms that can mount a variety of tools, powerful spotlights and unconventionally strong armor for a civilian mech.
Being able to withstand pressures found in sea trenches, the Neptune is used for deep-sea construction, tasks on heavy-G pressure-cooker worlds and scientific exploration. A larger variant holds a crew compartment and/or a small lab in its torso.
The combat use of the Neptune is limited, but its plating has been found to be highly resistant to non-energy weapons; this is compensated by its impractical weight and the mech's sluggish speed. Go to Comment
Intelligence without sentience? Is that even possible? Perchance intelligence without awareness of self, or without sufficient will to have one's self stand up to the self of others? Or a semblance of intelligence, much like a computer has?
It's a complicated concept, and needs to be clarified. Go to Comment
This is rather nice, I say!
A good twist on the stereotypical goblin sword-fodder, with the added benefit of another colony springing up anywhere a veglin corpse is left unburnt.
What I'd add, though, is that the different tribes receive the visions in varying quality, perchance with interference from other sources, leading to peculiar offshoots of Vega's spawn, some believing rather weird stuff.
Also, low-key villains will find it tempting to impersonate Vega to gain the services of Veglins.
Ah, to comment as well: it is a well-written sub, a little generic for my taste though. As it is set in the Battletech universe, it might benefit from flavor elements (PopCon is something I see the Draconis combine deploying; there might be a paragraph how the fat slow ammo-dependent Steiner 'Mechs profit from a forward base that can refill their 10 tons of ammo, and weld those 20 tons of ferro-fibrous back in a few hours. Go to Comment
This thing resembles that fortress from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles; also, the way it ended up on that backwater is hilarious and so utterly proper for this. I bet once they figure out the jump drive, the new owners will try to use it once more. Go to Comment
GURPS actually features a weapon like this, using tightly focused microwaves for long-range silent shots against unarmored targets.
The combination of stun and kill settings is practical, and the junkie application unique.
Still, I'd like to see something perky to set it apart. Go to Comment
The lumbering tool of a lumbering regime, how appropriate. In classic Battletech, it would be an overpriced piece of junk, but when you've got nothing better, it suddenly it becomes a life-saver.
Also, when you're a civilian, you care little about whether you get stepped on by this stone-age mech, or a custom-fitted Daishi. Go to Comment
For an added twist, the eldest of emperor whales can have the ability to command lesser sea creatures, luring schools of fish away from fishing grounds, calling up sea serpents to aid them or enticing dolphins to lead ships to cliffs.
Even darker could be the power to raise sunken ships from the ocean floor, with crew as skeletons, ghosts or bloated zombies, sailing towards the harbor with murder burning in the eyes, and storms brewing in the background. Go to Comment
Magic use somehow influences the minds of non-magi around the caster, evoking a primal response. While an apprentice may have a sufficiently strong aura that you feel an irrational need to slap him, an archmage engaged in spellcasting will drive anyone berserk.
For an added twist, the response need not be necessarily rage, but rather the emotion the individual is most predisposed towards, leading to maidens madly in love and jealous rivals.
To become a wizard, you must travel to the nineteen most sacred places in the world, which is rather difficult, especially without magic. Many would-be magi perish on the road.
15. The Rider Within
Magic is performed by calling a spirit to enter your body - and then keeping him in check. A mage must have an exceedingly strong will to prevent the spirit from escaping or taking him over. Go to Comment
Magic use leads to irreversible transformations of the body. These may be mutations, or more structured phenomena, such as all mages of all species slowly becoming a specific race, turning into the other gender, or becoming amorphous and invertebrate. Go to Comment
Honing his senses to perceive magic, the wizard sees things as patterns, strands and constructs infused with energy; once his eyes are open to the magical truth, there is no going back. Beauty fades for him, for what is a flower but a fragile pattern with a miniscule, ever-decreasing amount of energy? To him, every person is just a shape carrying its own death-clock, with rainbow serpents of emotion and thought running through it, a beautiful sunset is reduced to a drop in ambient energy density, and all loses its wonder.
Most mages become enstranged and depressive, drifting away from humanity and sanity alike. Go to Comment