Strolen\s Citadel content. 
Vitralara, the Mongrelmen
Lifeforms  (Constructed)   (City/ Ruin)
EchoMirage's comment on 2013-08-08 04:25 AM
I am going to steal the Emerald Tiger, 'cause it's awesome.
I am also going to steal the 8-legged horse.
The Devil Monkey and Lion-Hare are pretty cool too, and the Pika-sheep is cute.

All in all, a very good piece; the only thing I'd think about a bit is the 'genetics' of the Vitralara - or was it your intent to provide a background for the feeble DnD Mongrelman? Go to Comment
Lifeforms  (Intelligent Species)   (Space)
EchoMirage's comment on 2013-07-18 02:54 PM
Hey, where's that wickedness?
Also, are they cross-fertile with humans? Or do they just try? Go to Comment
Types of Dark Religions
Society/ Organizations  (Religious)   (World Wide)
EchoMirage's comment on 2013-04-26 04:43 PM
Please spellcheck and revise grammar. I§l hold my vote for now. Go to Comment
Angel BioModification
Systems  (Technical/ Mechanical)   (Specific)
EchoMirage's comment on 2013-03-20 09:20 AM
I would highly recommend GURPS Biotech for a thorough discussion of this topic - but you covered the main issues very well.

As others said, Lana is the top seller. Imagine a group of escaped Lanas from the Angel program... serving as mercs in some backwater.
They can be told apart only by their wings.
Dude. May I write the MercLanas up?
May I?
*bounces up and down on office chair* Go to Comment
Locations  (City)   (Tundra/ Arctic)
EchoMirage's comment on 2013-01-06 03:43 PM
Rather charming, I'd say. I wonder how long it will players take to call 'Santa? O.o' on this one. Go to Comment
Military Hover Bike
Items  (Transports)   (Combat)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-09-19 07:39 AM
What altitude can the bike reach?
Because, if it can go high enough, it can ignore most terrain, and needs just an open space to land. Go to Comment
Lifeforms  (Intelligent Species)   (Any)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-09-11 03:01 AM
The logic behind this is flawed.
a) humans treat cows as animals, as cows show no evidence of intelligence not culture, just a herd. You specifically state that Yothats breed out intelligence from their flock, hence are aware of that trait.
b) As described, Yothats lack the capacity to stand against humanity for long. Sure, they are big, but organized into tribes 50 strong - which will fall one by one; their social structure does not support acting in unison for any extended period of time.
c) societies with units of 50 will not have bankers, or even guilds. These rely on a large number of individuals living in a society to support their existence. Go to Comment
7 Things to Run or Hide From
Plots  (Travel)   (Encounter)
EchoMirage's comment on 2011-10-06 03:05 AM

I'd really suggest having unfinished 30 (Whatever) in the Forum and posting them here when they hit the mark. That will also serve as a sorting process: those that don't hit the '30' are apparently not interesting enough to go on front page anyways.

Go to Comment
Ko Girls
Society/ Organizations  (Artistic/Performance)   (Area)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-09-08 07:11 PM
They get it on, I guess. Go to Comment
CIC Cryodetention Center 19
Locations  (Fortification)   (Underground)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-09-09 04:29 PM
By adding the re-education during cryo, you made cryodetention actually meaningful.

A difficult thing is that writing up a prison facility places logical necessities and constraints on the author, making it difficult to get the 'I wish I had thouhgt of this!' moment.
A solid post, no less. Go to Comment
Items  (Books and Scrolls)   (Magical)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-09-09 04:37 PM
Tower of Forbidden Cats.

As this is written for DnD, and given the nature of the maker of the Catbook, perhaps the book simply suffuses the cat, and by petting it, you are instilled with the knowledge it contains (random fragment if by accident, the piece you want if intentional).
This makes accidentally unleashing the power more likely than if people simply open the cats. Go to Comment
Transportation in the Cosmic Era
Items  (Transports)   (Non-Magical)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-09-03 06:22 AM
Very dedicated, very thorough, highly consistent.
Two thumbs up, and an amused snicker for the 'Rusalka' submersible power armor. Go to Comment
Holoke Carter
NPCs  (Scenario Based)   (Domestic/ Craft)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-09-04 05:41 AM
I like the skinchangers far better out of WoD context; WoD does most of them a disservice. Go to Comment
Anophelite, Male
Lifeforms  (Intelligent Species)   (Swamp)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-09-05 05:11 AM
What about the female anophelites? Go to Comment
Andrew 12
NPCs  (Minor)   (Technical)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-08-30 04:46 PM
I'm missing something.

Dandy is now fit only as color, a memento to the horrors of artificial brains etc.
We want plot hooks! Give us more to adapt Dandy! Go to Comment
The Electric Chapel
Locations  (Establishment)   (CyberSpace)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-08-29 03:57 AM
We need more futuristic stuff like this! Moar!
Go to Comment
The Shrouding Kin
Items  (Clothes)   (Sentient)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-08-30 04:37 PM
Added a little about their mind, and more flavor to the Guardian - to use substances or elements, these must be tainted with abandonment and loss.
Also, added some more madness ad blasphemy, because why not. Go to Comment
The Shrouding Kin
Items  (Clothes)   (Sentient)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-08-30 04:41 PM
As you might have noted, there's no way to bestow a suit upon an adult.
If you prefer a greater availability, then, for example, it may be possible for just the Guardian to sire a child, so that the mother may wear her child - or for a female Guardian to conceive, birthing the father a young Guardian. Go to Comment
Divine One Kolou
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-08-23 03:08 AM
Take a glance at the usual extent and detail of submissions posted on Strolen's.
Look at the Hall of Honour / Golden submissions, and consult one of the elder authors.

To get a good reception and provide something of value to the GMs who frequent the site, a submission should be more than an idea - a full write-up with useful original detail. Don't go below an A4, in general. Go to Comment
The Artificial Brain
Items  (Other)   (Non-Magical)
EchoMirage's comment on 2012-08-23 04:23 AM
While I seriously doubt it would be ever possible to reconnect the 500 000 nerve fibers of the optic nerve of a removed eye, the rest of the writeup is pretty deep, and unless you get a nitpicking neuroscientist in your group, almost flawless.

Ah, I have to nitpick anyway.
Especially with the brain stem, you have monoaminergic nuclei which, especially in the case of the locus coeruleus, innervate all of the telencephalon. Their input is vital for cortical activation, mood, memory formation, wakefulness, etc. Its input is, methinks, impossible to replace with prosthetics.
The raphe nuclei of the brainstem supply vital serotonin.
The frontal lobe has the nucleus basalis Meynerti, which sends acetylcholine throughout the cortex. Same problem.

So - total replacement is not feasible. Replacement of some portions, while leaving vital structures intact, is more the way to go. Some handwavium may help to get over the inconsistencies.

Go to Comment
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