Strolen\s Citadel content. 
The Clowns Gang
Society/ Organizations  (Criminal/Espionage)   (Area)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2013-10-11 09:17 AM
This is pretty horrific. I mean, in sort of a good way. I'm not sure these guys would fit into the sorts of games I tend to run, but at the very least, the post makes a good format for a gang write-up, and there are definite strong points to this one. Go to Comment
30 More Gladiators
NPCs  (Extras)   (Combative)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2013-07-29 08:06 PM
Excellent. Asides from being useful to populate an arena in a hurry,many of these could be the center-point of their own adventures. The Mascot in particular excites my imagination, but they're all useable and interesting.

Top marks. Go to Comment
Marilanth Flower
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2013-05-10 09:35 PM
Ooh, I like it. Definitely an interesting poison, and one which I could definitely see seeing some use in a game.

There are no doubt a lot of plot hooks you can get from here, but I would like to see some actually listed out. I think a few good one's would really help this sub out.

You know, this could be a perfect justification for a unicorn hunt, for example. You could imagine a dream world parallel to this one. Perhaps kingsleep makes you more active there. Maybe the slowed bodily functions make this a substitute for stasis on a slower than light colony ship. Imagine trying to build a new colony when everybody can only work for an hour a day. Etc etc. Go to Comment
Flowers Of Innocence And The Killer Of Undertown
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2013-05-10 09:26 PM
An interesting take on the flowers. The most interesting part of this, I thought, was having prostitutes wear the flowers of innocence. That's just... wrong. I mean, if the flowers affect them, then what's the point where they become children? Go to Comment
Flowers Of Innocence
Lifeforms  (Flora)   (City/ Ruin)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2013-05-10 09:21 PM
The basic premise is solid, if a bit familiar. The specific mechanic by which this plant eats people is interesting, but I'm not sure I like the degree of perception required for "trap people, then call monsters." I might like to see a rework of that part if this were to be revisited.

That said, the drug use idea is great. Go to Comment
30 Devils
Plots  (Crisis)   (Single-Storyline)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2013-05-04 01:08 PM
Very nice. Evocative, interesting, and creepy. There's some good stuff here. Of course, you're still missing 9 of them, but keep going. It looks good! Go to Comment
The Devil Of The Mountain
Lifeforms  (Third Kingdom)   (Mountains)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2013-05-04 12:56 PM
Sorta disagree with Shadoweagle - this one is just a bit too open-ended for me. I feel like I would need more details before this would really spark my imagination into something interesting - as is, it's not much more than a horror movie monster.

Maybe 100 Word Submissions just aren't really for me.

It could, I suppose make a pretty solid session for a horror game. In that way, I like it - very less is more. Go to Comment
SR/L-1 Ostrich
Items  (Armor)   (Combat)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2013-03-03 09:35 PM
Not flashy, but certainly the sort of thing we'd probably see in mech-based warfare. The cynic in me wants to say, "Jeeps? Motorcycles?" but I try not to listen to him.

I am a bit curious as to why you say that an ostrich replacement is "not in the cards." If they're so ubiquitous, you'd think that everyone would want that contract.

And finally, I have no idea on what, if any, actual interactions occur between lions and ostriches, but your line "The Ostrich line there produces the lion's share of Ostriches in service." made me chuckle wondering about it. Go to Comment
Locations  (City)   (Tundra/ Arctic)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-12-28 09:44 PM
I really like how you've turned the Christmas stuff into a menacing fantasy location. The imagery is great, and there's a lot of stuff about this post that's just neat - ghost bears, collecting children, the Eternal Flames... and so on. It all reads very well.

I have some concern for how well this would actually work in play - it just seems a little too out of the way, though the Lord's travels make it easier to bring him in.

But all said and done, top notch. Go to Comment
Ghorion, the Weaponmaster
Lifeforms  (Unique)   (Mountains)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-12-14 10:30 PM
I kind of agree with axlerowes - this reads a lot like a description of a boss fight. It sounds very interesting and exciting, and definite points for that, but it's lacking in context. I feel like there's a lot that makes this guy important that I don't get from this submission. I think that the Glacier of Doom, for example, could very easily merit it's own submission, and improve this one by adding that context. Go to Comment
The Redheaded Corpse
Plots  (Event)   (Single-Storyline)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-12-14 10:46 PM
This is a good submission. The plot can be hooked into fairly easily, and there are a number of elements of momentary importance which could be adjusted to fit the scenario into a campaign. The setting helps to flavor things, but isn't critical, and the overall tale seems interesting.

My one problem is with the end. It's very abrupt. Rather, it's confusing in how it's supposed to tie together. I think an overview of the chain of events here would be very helpful. Go to Comment
Camel's Hump
Items  (Other)   (Non-Magical)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-11-13 09:58 PM
Speaking as someone who is not a lover of alcohol, I agree with Muro about its appeal due to its exoticness, and have no real knowledge of camels for it to nag at.

That said, while this sub has the interesting and artistic bits, I don't know how actually useable it is. I suppose some adventures could capture a treasure trove of fermenting camel humps or something,

I think that this could most benefit from some sample plot hooks, but it's not bad at all like this. Go to Comment
Potion of Euphemisms
Items  (Potion)   (Magical)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-10-04 06:05 PM
What we have here is a sub that really pushes my buttons, if you know what I mean.

(Also, it probably deserves the silly freetext) Go to Comment
Potion of Euphemisms
Items  (Potion)   (Magical)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-10-05 02:21 PM
Guys, you're doing it wrong, if you know what I mean. Go to Comment
Plains Elves
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-10-04 05:57 PM
This submission has a decent overview of a culture, but I have one major problem with it - it doesn't really connect together. It seems like a bunch of disparate elements just kind of stuck together. If farming is so difficult on this plain, then wouldn't it make more sense to be nomadic and follow the herd animals? But seemingly, farming is important to these people. If it is, go with that; don't feel compelled to weaken "farmers in hostile land" by saying "but they're mostly hunter-gatherers." Also, there's nothing here that distinguishes them as elves as opposed to humans or dwarves or any other people.

I think that there's a lot of potential in this submission, but you need to develop it a bit more to make that potential shine through. Go to Comment
Bacon the Dog
NPCs  (Minor)   (Domestic/ Craft)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-09-29 08:35 AM
Very nice. You can never have too many animal mascots. (That's a lie - there's definitely a limit). Go to Comment
Yethamerands Stonecloak
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-09-22 04:06 PM
Stands out to me as almost an organization or race magic item, rather than a unique one. You could have some sort of 'sinister' organization built around having these cloaks and the ability to see all around the world, or even farther.

Or perhaps the cloaks made by some ancient people, and now only used by this organization, who use them only for espionage, not fathoming some greater purpose.... Go to Comment
The Clothes of Alexander Sehtolc
Items  (Clothes)   (Magical)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-09-22 03:54 PM
This submission is a bit dull. I mean, the idea of magic items that come in sets is one that I don't see used to it's full potential that often, but this is just not that interesting of a go at it.

The individual items themselves are fairly standard as far as items go, so they have to hang on the background and connectivity to be really interesting, and there just isn't anything extra there.

It's not a bad submission, it just doesn't really stand out to me. Go to Comment
The Hellephant
Lifeforms  (Fauna)   (Any)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-08-12 07:46 PM
Terrifying. And I love the name.

I have a hard time envisaging an elephant with three trunks, but perhaps that's part of the appeal.

A good giant and a nice kaiju. Go to Comment
Amazons and Orcs
Society/ Organizations  (Ethnic/Cultural)   (Regional)
Dragonlordmax's comment on 2012-06-23 09:26 AM
I think that this region would work well in a big sandbox sort of game. Players can just sort of blunder into the middle of things and run about wreaking havoc and having all sorts of effects on the outcome of the war. Or get involved on either side. Perhaps the most impressive result would be to achieve some form of reconciliation, but that might not be sp great for the rest of the world. I agree with Muro that it works well in it's simplicity.

I especially like the inclusion of characters of note, which really helps to show how complex this could potentially be made.

My one complaint is that, since you've included the divination and exotic mount free texts, I would have liked to see more detail on those two subjects. Go to Comment
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