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The Cup that Floweth Over
Plots  (Mystical)   (Side-Quest)
Dozus's comment on 2015-03-17 07:18 AM
A nice demonstration of how one little magic item can wreck a whole village. Well done. Go to Comment
Bannington Lapur LRTI AA
Items  (Ranged Weapons)   (Combat)
Dozus's comment on 2014-05-08 10:38 AM
A solid sub that fits the 100 word limit well. It's fairly standard in terms of mechanics - big gun, long cool down, used on craft - but you cover a lot of ground in the space provided. Go to Comment
Evolutionary Theology
Articles  (Setting Building)   (Game Mastering)
Dozus's comment on 2014-04-28 09:24 AM
I'm not sure either, but I'm glad it did. This has some great bones for world building. I think your categories of faiths are broad enough to extend beyond Western-style religions. I think you've covered roughly all the major world religions in here.

I like the mention of syncretism in Unified Paganism. Syncretism is fascinating to me, diverse and myriad faiths adopting each other's gods and practices. I'd like to see more of that discussed in this article, but that's probably personal bias. Go to Comment
18 Gifts from Elder Gods, Outer Gods, and Cosmic Horrors
Articles  (Humor/ Editorial)   (Gaming - Genre)
Dozus's comment on 2014-04-26 09:16 PM
The Ancient Ones are not bound by your mortal numbers. Indeed, their 18 is superior to your human 30. You could not begin to comprehend the Cosmic 30.

A fine selection presented here. I like the the "gifts" are not so often physical things but abominable curses. Go to Comment
7 More Reasons Why Not Everyone is a Magic User
Articles  (Resource)   (Gaming - Genre)
Dozus's comment on 2014-02-07 07:02 AM
Magic always has a price. All magic dealings are essentially "deals with the devil" in that they cost the user some part of themselves or something/one they hold dear.

Magic brings age. The reason why wizards always have long, flowing beards? Using magic takes years off of one's life. Powerful users rarely make it past 30.

Magic is socially unacceptable. Sorcerers are more than just feared, they're hated, even hunted. Why risk using magic when you'll wind up cut off from society? Go to Comment
My Taalkastin Boatman
NPCs  (Minor)   (Natural)
Dozus's comment on 2014-10-06 11:00 AM
I'm bumping this because it's so great. Go to Comment
My Taalkastin Boatman
NPCs  (Minor)   (Natural)
Dozus's comment on 2014-04-01 07:32 AM
Any bias of using my own setting aside, I absolutely loved this. The narrative had me riveted from the opening lines to the last, and even though the ending was alluded to in the intro, I was still surprised by it.

You give a better characterization for a brutal, animalistic humanoid than I could have hoped for, as well as built very nicely on the skeleton outline of Swynmoor errata I provided.

Very well done. Go to Comment
Golden Golem
Lifeforms  (Constructed)   (Any)
Dozus's comment on 2014-03-24 10:30 PM
The overall idea is eminently practical - a walking deposit box. The profile face thing is pretty clever, too. Go to Comment
Valadaars First Submission Advice
Articles  (Rules and Advice)   (Citadel Help)
Dozus's comment on 2014-03-11 04:10 PM
This is good starter advice. The content suggestions aren't bad, though as you say it's hard to set iron-clad rules for content. A first-time poster would do well to follow this advice.

I'm almost taking the "Self-named Characters" issue as a challenge, since Dozus was one of my first fantasy RP character, but on further review I remember he's a Drizzt clone and better left unspoken of. Go to Comment
The Vile Vial
Items  (Potion)   (Villanous)
Dozus's comment on 2014-03-11 04:12 PM
Did you take it from in-work to regular? That spits it out onto the front page.

I think this might have been better left a 100. It's short and kind of fun, but for a full sub it doesn't have a lot to it. Go to Comment
Gravediggers' Legacy
Items  (Equipment Listing)   (Combat)
Dozus's comment on 2014-03-11 04:16 PM
Sentient shovel sub is a go! I always like animated objects that do their own thing, and this one has a nice background.

It would be interesting if instead of or in addition to burying folk, they dug them up. You go into a cemetery one morning to find all the coffins uncovered, with no trace of the perpetrators. Go to Comment
My Last Crop of Humans
NPCs  (Mythic/ Historical)   (Domestic/ Craft)
Dozus's comment on 2014-03-04 11:32 AM
Bro, I feel like you're picking a quarrel where there ain't one. Go to Comment
My Last Crop of Humans
NPCs  (Mythic/ Historical)   (Domestic/ Craft)
Dozus's comment on 2014-03-04 08:30 AM
It does have a nice flow to it, and it's interesting to hear the historical perspective, as it were.

I'm with Silver on the ending. I'm sure it's purposefully ambiguous and the reader is supposed to read between the lines, but it is a bit abrupt. A little more to it would help wrap things up. Go to Comment
7 Royal Courts
Locations  (Establishment)   (Plains)
Dozus's comment on 2014-02-28 08:04 PM
I was wondering how you could do seven of these. I figured either you'd have too much detail, something that would need to be in a 30, or too little diversity. But you hit just the right mark. It's a good variety, broad enough to drop into any aristocracy but varied enough to provide very different flavors for the various monarchies a setting might have.

The only typo I see is in #5, which I believe is spelled "Debauched."

This is a great 7: it sates the palette, neither overstuffed nor unsatisfied, but the perfect amount. Well done. Go to Comment
Lescelina the Witch Queen
NPCs  (Scenario Based)   (Religious)
Dozus's comment on 2014-02-26 01:04 PM
I was researching Nahuatl and read a terribly interesting article on disfrasismo ( I figured since I was borrowing heavily from Mesoamerican culture for the Kanaarites, I'd try my hand at imitating it. I'm not thrilled with it, but I kind of like the style. Go to Comment
Cosmic Era: Mortal Kombat I Dossier
NPCs  (Scenario Based)   (Combative)
Dozus's comment on 2014-03-02 01:17 PM
I like your treatment/adaptation of this. I for one would want to see more, perhaps of other mythoi. Might I suggest Tekken? They've got some inexplicable characters and techniques I'd like to see Cosmicized.

You said Scorpion was the result of "infernal sorcery." Do you mean *magic* magic, or something else? I don't recall magic being a feature of the Cosmic Era setting, though you'll forgive me if I missed it mentioned in your wide corpus of work. Go to Comment
7 Things About Criticism
Articles  (Humor/ Editorial)   (Citadel Help)
Dozus's comment on 2014-02-26 08:07 AM
All commentors and submitters should read this monthly to remind themselves what good criticism is, and what to do with criticism. Those periodic times when people forget one or the other tend to cause offense to be taken unnecessarily, and nobody likes that. Go to Comment
30 Judges
NPCs  (Scenario Based)   (Political)
Dozus's comment on 2014-02-26 09:17 PM
Only voted Go to Comment
The Brotherhood of the Land of Nod
Society/ Organizations  (Criminal/Espionage)   (Area)
Dozus's comment on 2014-02-26 01:11 PM
I was kind of expecting just a Cosmic Era take on C&C, but I really like the direction this one headed. It makes sense for a religious-to-zealous region like the Arabian Peninsula venerate super tech like arcanotechnology.

Interesting that you make it a secret society rather than a militant empire. Are there analogues to al-Qaida and the like, or am I reading too much into it? Go to Comment
30 Mecha Design Flaws
Systems  (Combat/ Warfare)   (General)
Dozus's comment on 2014-02-20 10:18 AM
Great details on this one. I like that it's not just mechanical or combat situations but some sociopolitical too. Fits well into your setting, but could be easily modified for others. Go to Comment
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