An origin story in the classical style, done very well.
I agree and disagree with Aramax. He does sound sort of heroic - his motivation isn't that different from, say, Captain Planet - but that begs the question as to the difference between a hero and a villain. Is it intention? Motivation? Action? Costume? Goatee? Go to Comment
Can't speak for Val, but for myself, the following come to mind:
- Who's Balor? Yeah yeah, evil god, but they're a dime a dozen. What makes him stand out?
- Who's Waylan? Why is he hexed?
- Once Waylan made said armor, who used it? How? What became of it? Go to Comment
I was going to ask in what capacity a thieves' guild or the like would even use heraldry. I should think those in the underworld generally don't want to be caught and would avoid using distinct symbols for themselves. And where would they put it? I can't see a thief with a banner.
But Val and Cheka give some solid potential uses. I could also see it used in a crime lord's parlor (crime lords have parlors, yes?) where it could show his or her prestige.
At the very least, the ideas are thought out and interesting. Go to Comment
I'm not sure either, but I'm glad it did. This has some great bones for world building. I think your categories of faiths are broad enough to extend beyond Western-style religions. I think you've covered roughly all the major world religions in here.
I like the mention of syncretism in Unified Paganism. Syncretism is fascinating to me, diverse and myriad faiths adopting each other's gods and practices. I'd like to see more of that discussed in this article, but that's probably personal bias. Go to Comment
Any bias of using my own setting aside, I absolutely loved this. The narrative had me riveted from the opening lines to the last, and even though the ending was alluded to in the intro, I was still surprised by it.
You give a better characterization for a brutal, animalistic humanoid than I could have hoped for, as well as built very nicely on the skeleton outline of Swynmoor errata I provided.
This is good starter advice. The content suggestions aren't bad, though as you say it's hard to set iron-clad rules for content. A first-time poster would do well to follow this advice.
I'm almost taking the "Self-named Characters" issue as a challenge, since Dozus was one of my first fantasy RP character, but on further review I remember he's a Drizzt clone and better left unspoken of. Go to Comment