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The Vortex Well
Locations  (Other)   (Other)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-20 05:16 PM


The noise in this place must be incredible.  I can imagine that the longing for silence, for stillness, would eventually come to equal the longing for dry land.  Still, it is incomplete as Echo first pointed out.  A little more development would help.


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The Hell of Half-Nothings
Locations  (TransWorld)   (Any)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-20 04:58 PM


I really love the description of this place, and I can imagine it in vivid clarity and detail.  The writing is really well done.  However, I agree with Echo: it simply lacks something to make it come alive for me.  It's the central concept, really, that bothers.  Why should anticipation be needed to enjoy a job well done?  You have a vision for the project, work towards its completion, and can admire the result when you're done -- no surpise necessary. 



Perhaps what you were looking for is not a lack of surprise, but a feeling of waste.  The feeling that one's talents, skills and abilities lie unused and unrecognized.  Having to watch others bumble along at a task that you are much better suited for.  That or just simply being prevented from doing what comes naturally, or from using the skills that you have the most pride in.



Either way, this is a solid piece.  I just see so much potential for it to evolve into something truly horrifying.

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The Non
Locations  (Other)   (Other)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-20 04:22 PM


A simple, yet powerful idea.  Thank you for adding the part about entering The Non and the reasons for doing so -- it helps with bringing the concept to the table.


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Katumus
Locations  (TransWorld)   (Other)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-19 11:56 PM
Those are extremely good points, and you will forgive me for taking a bit of time to think about them, before responding, I hope. I haven't actually had any experience in planeswalking or interdimensional RPGing, but I can say that I envisioned bringing this to a game session as a way to sorely test the players' faith in a kind afterlife. As they walk the hallways, they should see names they recognize -- good friends, grandparents, former party members -- people who they deeply care about and who SHOULD have moved on by now (at least, according to the dominant religion back home). They should see people they admire and respect being broken down bit by bit, their minds slowing descending into guilt-driven madness.

Combine that with the time limit of a spiritual quest, and you should have heroes who are sorely tempted to stop and help many people but just *can't* before the time runs out. And therein lies the only true benefit in helping a soul move on -- it's all about easing a character's conscience or testing their compassion in a difficult situation. It may be a way for them to gain information, resolve an old dispute, or perhaps even evoke pity for a hated enemy.

Interfering in any way outside the normal "rules" for Katumus should be dealt with swiftly and mercilessly by the various guardians. Perhaps the characters could even be held accountable for such actions in their own afterlife. Serious enough transgressions here could possibly lead to soul perma-death, like being cast into The Non. This isn't to say that the players couldn't get away with some things -- they'd just have to be able to smooth-talk or find another creative way out of trouble.

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Katumus
Locations  (TransWorld)   (Other)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-20 03:10 PM
Update: Fixed a few grammatical errors (thanks, Echo). Go to Comment
Katumus
Locations  (TransWorld)   (Other)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-20 03:11 PM
I really, really like this plot hook. Thanks for the idea :) Go to Comment
Katumus
Locations  (TransWorld)   (Other)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-22 10:30 AM
I agree with both of you, but I'm unsure really how to fix it. Considering how beaurocratic Katumus is, having the judge's punishments be completely literal (if not really fair) may just be an inherent flaw in the system. At one point, I was considering giving the judge the power to affect the person's next life (having them be reborn into a poor family, as a person of the opposite gender, into the body of an animal, etc).

Really though, the judge is just a stand-in for the GM, so feel free to use whichever justice system jives best with your campaign setting and vision. Go to Comment
The Box
Locations  (TransWorld)   (Other)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-20 04:17 PM


I'd love to hear a little more about the philosophy behind this place.  Is it one of many hells, each dealing with a different phobia?  Or is it unique, created for some special purpose or by some twisted god?  (I would love to see the Hell created by and for your Occular deities, by the way).  Why the box concept?  Is there some special cultural significance or horror to the idea of being trapped this way?


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Avaricious
Locations  (Area)   (Water)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-20 03:20 PM


This is definitely something special.  The last paragraph, in particular, stood out for its excellent writing.  Don't have much to add, other than you could be a little clearer with the visuals on the crew for the Justification -- the Labyrinth comment really helped clarify that concept for me, because I didn't understand that the crew was carrying the trash piles around on their back the first time through.  Also, I agree that the trash golems and pale keepers could be further elaborated on.


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My Notes on Shadow as a Component of Magic
Articles  (Fiction)   (Gaming - Genre)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-09 11:26 AM


An interesting look into an under-used spell component.  I enjoyed the lecture format, though Shadow-Boxing could be a little better defined before going into the applications of it.  For example, it's not clear how Longstriding and Shadow-Boxing are related.


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NPC Characteristics
NPCs  (Extras)   (Artistic/Performance)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-09 11:15 AM


I've seen many lists like this one before, but that doesn't mean that they are not necessary.  The only suggestion I can offer is to take the same characteristics again and reorganize them in a different section of the sub.  Perhaps group them into categories like physical vs mannerisms, or gross vs irrititating vs charming vs disturbing etc.  That way it would be easier to use such a large list if you're looking for something specific, rather than relying on a dice roll for a random characteristic.  Not that the dice roll method is bad -- it just doesn't help me find something that fits an NPC concept I already have.


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Law of the Hammer
Articles  (Rules and Advice)   (Citadel Help)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-08 06:43 PM


A request for clarification: is the commentor him/herself allowed to mention why they voted they way they did, as long as it is voluntary?  If I give a low score to something that needs obvious improvement, I may be tempted to include a statement like "I normally vote a 3 or less on something with this many grammatical errors" -- in addition to any suggestions I might have to improve the submission itself.  It's OK with me if that is now a Hammer Offense, but I would like to know in advance.


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Law of the Hammer
Articles  (Rules and Advice)   (Citadel Help)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-09 10:22 AM
It probably is, but don't question my methods, man! (I kid, I kid) Go to Comment
A New Take on Hell
Articles  (Resource)   (Gaming - In General)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-09 03:46 PM


An interesting idea for a codex.  Here's one more for you: Katumus


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A New Take on Hell
Articles  (Resource)   (Gaming - In General)
Dossta's comment on 2011-08-21 02:04 PM
Interesting idea, but where do the actual women go? Go to Comment
Incarnate Ascension
Systems  (Divine/ Spirit)   (Specific)
Dossta's comment on 2013-03-12 05:01 PM
This could be a very compelling religious system, if it answered a few more questions. First, is this the actual reality of the universe, or just something taught by a religious sect? Second, if this is reality, how aware are the people of the varying shards? Do they have legends about other shards? Are there accounts of visitors from nearby shards?

Could make a really interesting game, but it's a bit too "high-concept" to really make it to the table. Go to Comment
Corran's Self-Closing Chamber Pot
Items  (Home/ Personal)   (Cursed)
Dossta's comment on 2011-04-22 12:29 PM
That's fine, but I thought that Veracit owned the Blade. Did Corran end up keeping it after his death? Nitpicking, I know, but I'm interested in the story of these two NPCs. Go to Comment
Corran's Self-Closing Chamber Pot
Items  (Home/ Personal)   (Cursed)
Dossta's comment on 2011-04-22 12:32 PM


I'll echo Silveressa's comment about failed experiments -- this kind of thing should be quite common in a world where magic items are created by almost anyone.  Thanks for the reminder!  One question: if the seagull hadn't pooed on the chamber pot while it was being set out to dry, would it have worked perfectly?


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30 Dragon-Related Plots and Encounters
Plots  (Coincidence)   (Encounter)
Dossta's comment on 2011-04-22 10:12 AM
Yeah, I'm still a pretty new DM; subtlety just isn't my forte. If you listed the worst offenders, however, I could try to rework them a little. And specific suggestions for improvement are always welcome :) Go to Comment
30 Dragon-Related Plots and Encounters
Plots  (Coincidence)   (Encounter)
Dossta's comment on 2012-06-26 12:22 PM
Update: Added 30 freetext Go to Comment
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