This is a well written sub. The item has a backstory and a purpose, a reason for being, and a very evocitive description so that you 'see' the weapon in use. Excellent writing all around!
I do hold one point with Cheka Man. As strolens is not a system specific website, we try to avoid stats when we can. If you want to provide them, I would recommend putting them in a reply to your own sub to help keep them seperate. Another personal point, this thing definately is an artifact level item, its valued at over half a milltion gold! Once cost get up that high, I usually dont attach price tags to them, that's a lot of gold!
FYI: I did indeed take a long break from Strolens at one point, so long I am reading my own subs and it seems a different voice wrote them than my own, however, it was not due to any voting and/or arguments. I started a family and was busy. Now I'm struggling to keep my house and busy, but strangely less busy than I was before. I may not pick back up my former level of activity, and am unsure of my voice, but I am back, and glad to be here.
Great submission. A simple sweet way to give depth to characters, just the right amount of depth. Not too much, not too little, and all with just a simple blurb. I plan on incorperating this into many of my own works. Great job!
It is railroady, and I apologise for that. Plots are not my forte, item creation is. That I'm even getting a passing 3/5 is already better than I'd hoped and better than I remember most of my plots doing. Thank you for your comments, hopefully I can work it into something better in the future.
I like the list. Along with nobody's comment, I could easily see a post for 30 torches, they are so ubiquitous and versatile. The shoes also strike me as being problematic though, as they either need to be a) used by specially trained personnel or b) magical.
The entry about the urn also set off a spark in my head for a creative and quick disguise, so good work on that one too.
Overall good work!
Ah ha! Here's one that does something! It is indeed a variant of the old instant fortress, but I like it. Adventurers are always looking for ways to satisfy their needs, and the need for shelter is an important one.
Again there is a good backstory, although a magic user that can comfortably or effectively man a tower shield in an unusual one by most standards. This has a feel that the creator was kind of patched together to try to make the item make sense.
All good and no bad is a fine line to walk too, but really, it's a tower. There were no drawbacks to the original, and what are you going to do to make a drawback? This item is fine without any hindrances thrown in that don't make sense.
Good foundation piece. It has a good backstory, a reason for its creation, existance, and purpose. I'm looking forward to seeing what you come up with when you have the item actually do something. ;)
Items (Other) (Non-Magical)
Needs some more meat on the bones, but gave me the kick to post a new submission. Come on people, surely you can find some minor magic to add.
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