I agree also!! I am new to role playing and would find it helpful! after all I would hate to step on anyone toes. I personally prefer to start out from the bottom (with charecters power and such) then my character can allow the expreience she encoutered mold her mind as well as her power! A world pack would also help players decide if this was th ekind of setting and story they might be interseted in joining before they jump in!!!! Go to Comment
This is not bad, but he seems too powerful for me. You need to add some of his flaws, having a character that good risks a player becoming unbeatable and thus soon boring.
I do like your description of his physical attributes, especially his hair. However someone once told me that the soul is seen through the eyes alone, and you said nothing of them. Also you said he had an ageless face, you still might give some idea as to how old he is not necessarily an exact number, but some sense of his age. After all wisdom in some cultures is equated with age.
I noticed that you said you planned on adding more information tomorrow so I will wait until then to vote. I assume that you will go in to this character emotionally as well. So I can't wait to read it! Remember that these are mere suggestions, take them as you will. I mean them only as constructive criticism. Go to Comment
I am with the cap'n It does sem to be missing something. Maybe the character has dreams or flashbacks and the others in the community now look up to that person to try and understand this plot could have potential twists in it such as the Main character trying to find out what has trespassed and why only he can remember snatches of what happend may even end in the fact that He himself caused the amnesia if he were the "powerful magic" and something had gone wrong in his final spell. Perhaps that is why he is the only one that remembers anything, because the magic was his own. As for the dead disapearing that is a little morbid, however maybe they were part of teh reason the spell was cast? Just a few suggestions take them as you see their worth. Go to Comment
Perhaps instead the ship comes to life as the heaven's grow dark. People from the past begin to laugh and sing joyously luring the new found passengers to partake in the activities. The catch: These people from the past were once lured upon the very same ship that emerged from the very same cloud of mist. By joining the ghosts from the past the new passengers are doomed to stay there only to lure more unsuspecting followers on to the strange ship. By night the souls of these poor townsfolk are free to relive the same night into which they were captured, however by day they must remain the essential life force of the ship , which is obvoiusly a demonic device, uses these souls to feed upon during the day when it is weakend.
The plot thickens: A mysterious sailor comes into the next unsuspecting town. He along with a few others board the ship. the usual happenings go on however the sailor, for some unknown reason, is unaffected while the others are. The plot line consists of the sailor exploring the goings on and then trying to understand why he was unaffected. eventually he will unravel the mystery and discover the source of the evil find a way to destroy it and releasing the souls on the cursed ship!