"Aww, dang, did you fart again?" asked the Jordy, The Knight.
"No, screw you! I didn’t fart in the first place!" replied The Scoundrel, Harris. What they didn’t know was that the Smelbinders could hear their every word.
The Master walked over to the strange symmetrical mechanism. He flipped it over… The sands of the hourglass began to flow and it whirred to life. "One hour," said The Master, "Practice."
It was Young Jim’s first battle. He was known for being a tireless worker in the field and a very patriotic young man. But he didn’t understand this strange armor they put him in… And he didn’t know it would be the Last Armor he ever wore.
"You shall never catch anything but a whiff of me!" Vaivin yelled, as he ran down the dark tunnel being chased by giant rats. All of a sudden he was gone and all that remained was a cloud of gas.
These are the Gods of Food and Eating! Beware their culinary prowess and tremble before the might of their cookery! These are… More Placeholder Gods!
"Did you hear that? He speaks to those who would listen. Simply adjust your hearing frequency and you will hear his voice." - Audicus, Disciple of the Sound Mind and Body.
The Magnetic Bolas can be thrown at an enemy’s melee weapon to hinder its effeciancy, making it harder to swing, and causing it to miss more often.
Dusk Cheese is a naturally occuring lubricant and potent alchemical ingredient.
The Necronautilus is a huge undead whale used to transport undead and their masters secretly.
Here we go! Everything you need for the next barfight that railroads the players into a party. Yes!
Ever hear a noise you just can’t pinpoint? Ever have that buzzing in your ears? If yes, you may have been the victim of a Wand of Illusory Sound!
Scattered across the world are the worshippers of the Red Pantheon: Damascus Fellnorn and Xak the Fiendish, two godlings on a quest for world domination who command hordes of undead and many skilled swordsmen.
The proud dwarven Captain Dugfar stood atop his mighty machine of magic and stone looking down the mountain they had just emerged from; letting the wind whip his beard over his shoulder… "This is a proud day for the Dwarves!" He bellowed. "...and this is just the start!"
The Furry Tree-Zombies were a race of Tribal Jungle Halflings untill an insane Re-Animator discovered their existance.
The Moaning Lands of the Dead and Dying. Many foul creatures of undeath roam here and seek living flesh, no one is quite sure what happened to this large desert island. Maybe you could unlock the mystery and free the tormented.
The Cursed form of poor Shump Thokk. He will offer helpful advice to anyone who dons the helmet.
“I open door number one”
“Watch Out for that… ouch… ”
“Oh look, a glass wall between us and the treasure.”
A Legendary magic item given to Oamahar of the Wise by Aurorobouros for achieving perfect harmony with the elements. Warning: This item may not really exist, nobody knows.
Patrick Greenbottle was once a normal halfling with a love of potions. Now he has been transformed into something much more.
When the characters approach a clearing in the forest, they will see 4 ogres who are guarding, and preventing from escape, 4 human males, and 3 human females. The ogres will see the party and leap to attack. The females will scream "OUR SAVIORS!!" and run screaming straight across the currently forming battlefield, in between ogres and party members, to hide behind the rearmost party members. They will be safe there. The males will try to skirt the battle to the north side to join the women.
To the south, giants will be hiding in the thick underbrush until the party has engaged the ogres and then attack the most opportune target EXCEPT the ones that the females are next to.
It should be noted that the female commoners are not female commoners at all, nor are the male commoners actually male commoners. The female commoners are the hags, who have polymorphed themselves as the commoners in their stewpot to escape detection. The males skirting the battle are actually MORE ogres, the hags were in the process of polymorphing ALL the ogres into regular humans for ambush purposes. The REAL commoners are already dead, having found their way into the coven's cauldron for dinner.
The hags (the women) will position themselves near to any spellcasters in the rear first, and then near anyone else in the back of the fight. The ogres (the men) will wait until the hags shift form, and then attack first the rear folks, then shift into the melee.
It is possible that the characters, as they approach the ogres, will notice the giants in the bush, and be able to warn the others of the ambush.
GAME NOTES: If you sell the screaming women correctly, they will not even be suspected until it is too late. Therein lay the problem. This encounter is ESPECIALLY deadly to the rear eschelon of the party. It is entirely possible that the hags will finish off half the party before they even realize they have been duped. Caution is required if the game master wishes to avoid a TPK(total party kill).